Katiefucious Say

Meme

2010-05-27T20:37:00.003-05:00

You guys are hurting my feelings.

Lunzie did it.

Yes, I know. I'm hilarious.

The Katiefucious Meme

2010-05-12T09:15:00.002-05:00

I actually love memes. They are the easiest blogs I've ever written in my life.

But really, who writes these things? Twelve-year olds? If you were a crayon, what color would you be? What's your favorite food? Comeon, nobody cares what my favorite food is. I don't even care what my favorite food is, because I'm trying to lose weight and I'll NEVER BE ABLE TO EAT IT AGAIN.

So I decided to write a meme about the stuff I care to know about other people. I'm not going to ask you what your favorite this or that is (except for #2), because I don't have a favorite anything (Aliens). I have like ten favorite everythings... Well, OK I'll ask you for a few favorites, but just because I want to know. But I won't ask you for very many.

Anywho, the meme. Here it is. Enjoy.

The Katiefucious Meme

1. What is your favorite color?

Just kidding!

1. What is your blood type, and how often do you donate blood? If you don't donate blood, why the hell not? Are you afraid of needles, you wuss?

2. What is your favorite Alien movie? (AVP movies don't count)

3. Speaking of AVP, did you notice the Bishop reference Henriksen makes in the beginning? It's awesome! Ten bucks if you can tell me what it is.

4. Name five reasons why AVP: Requiem was a Godawful piece of crap. Please place them in alphabetical order.

5. Write your favorite bread recipe here.

6. Ok, so you're driving in the left hand lane on a 4-lane highway. The right hand lane is empty, and you notice someone coming up quickly behind you. What do you do? (warning: your answer to this question will determine whether or not we can be friends in the future)

7. Write your multiplication tables on a sheet of notebook paper as fast as you can. How fast can you do it? (If you had to use a calculator, hit yourself in the head with a hammer)

8. Name your five favorite Jet Li movies.

9. What are your favorite parts of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, in chronological order?

10. Give your initial impressions of Plotinus' interpretation of the soul. Use 12 point font. Double space.

11. Is Milla Jovovich a good actress or do we make excuses for her because she's really pretty?

12. "Pride and Prejudice" with Kiera Knightley: best movie ever made? (if you are male, your answer will be stricken from the record)

13. The first three Indiana Jones movies were so good. Please list, in order of significance, the ways in which Spielberg and Lucas screwed up Crystal Skull.

14. George A Romero, Lucio Fulci, or Dario Argento?

15. Ten bucks if you can name Dario Argento's daughter, and three movies she has been in.

16. Cubs or Sox?

17. Why do people wear leggings?

18. Do you recycle? If you don't, why the hell not? Are you too lazy? I oughta tie you up and leave you at the top of a landfill, you jerk! Then I bet you'd recycle!

19. What kinds of bedding plants do you like to use?

20. Did you cry at the end of Jedi, when Luke's fa...er, I mean Darth Vader died? (don't wanna spoil it for the three of you who haven't seen it yet)

21. Would you like my banana bread recipe?

22. What is your favorite Star Trek movie?

23. What was your English term paper about during your senior year of high school?

24. What is your favorite episode of Firefly?

25. List, in order of significance, the reasons why the Kill Bill movies were awesome.

26. Why do people get so upset when you can't think of something to get them for Christmas and you get them a gift card?

27. Why does a bottle of 28 Amoxicillin tablets cost $80?

28. Have you ever tried Haggis, and if so, what did you think of it?

29. What is your favorite episode of MST3K?

30. How do you like to prepare your asparagus?

31. Do you hassle vegetarians?

32. If you could have anything for free for the rest of your life, what would it be?

33. New Dr Who or old Dr Who?

34. List your 5 favorite Ron Perlman movies, in alphabetical order.

35. If the Baby Jesus came back today, and the world ended, do you think you'd go to heaven, or to "h" "e" double hockey sticks?

36. Can anyone explain to me what the hell happened at the end of the Matrix trilogy?

37. Describe your favorite Wil Wheaton vehicle, be it acting, writing, or general geekery.

38. World of Warcraft: Consummate Evil or Gaming Genius?

39. Why are little brothers so annoying?

40. Eragon: brilliant original piece, or total ripoff of Anne McCaffrey?

Er...I'm running low on ideas. Let me know if you do it so I can read your answers.

Pet Peeves

2010-05-09T18:42:00.003-05:00

Pet Peeve #197: Waiting to turn left at an intersection. Someone pulls up next to you in a giant SUV, waiting to turn right. You can't see past them to determine if traffic is coming. You'll have to wait until they move so that you can see. Only by that time, another idiot in a giant SUV is more than happy to take their place. Will you ever be able to turn left? Probably not. You'll die in your car and be eaten by wolves.

Handy old-school diagram:

I think the thing that's so annoying about this situation is that if you're in an equally giant SUV, they can't see past you either. They sit there moving back and forth trying to see past you, or through your windows. I want to hold up a sign that says "YOU ARE A MORON." Or this "YOU CAN'T SEE PAST ME BECAUSE YOU PULLED UP TOO FAR, IDIOT"

My new word for people who can't drive: psycho. They are obviously mentally imbalanced if they have problems deciding when their turn is at a 4-way stop.

Roundabout Training

2010-03-20T08:09:00.002-05:00

I love roundabouts. I think they should be everywhere. But I also think that roundabout training courses should be mandatory for anyone who doesn't immediately know what to do when they approach one. Especially when there are INSTRUCTIONAL SIGNS ALL OVER THE DAMN PLACE.

For your viewing pleasure, here are my own personal rules for going through the roundabout in town:

1. You don't have to stop before you go through the roundabout. Hell, you don't even have to slow down if there are no other cars around! Think of a roundabout like an optional stop sign. If there is no-one coming, YOU DON'T HAVE TO STOP.

2. DON'T STOP IN THE ROUNDABOUT. MARY MOTHER OF EFFING GOD, I SWEAR I AM GOING TO REAR END SOMEONE ON PURPOSE ONE OF THESE DAYS. If you are IN the roundabout, and someone is approaching, DON'T FREAKIN' STOP. When you're already in the roundabout, you have the right of way. Also, don't go five miles an hour in the roundabout. GET IN, GET OUT, GET ON WITH IT. We're in cars for a reason. I want to get from point A to point B in a reasonable time frame. LIKE BEFORE I DIE OF OLD AGE.

3. Read the signs. They are posted on EVERY CORNER, IN BIG BLACK AND WHITE LETTERS, WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN YOU ARE IN EACH LANE. Don't use the outside turn lanes to go straight. Don't use the inside lanes to turn right. IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE, PEOPLE.

4. Don't just barrel into the roundabout without looking to see if there's someone coming. Common sense, right? Apparently not. And if you do accidentally pop out in front of me with that "OOPS OH MY GOD" look on your face, don't slam on your brakes because you're about to crap your pants. TIGHTEN YOUR SPHINCTER, PUT YOUR FOOT ON THE GAS PEDAL, AND GET OUT OF MY WAY.

5. If you don't know how to use the roundabout, STAY THE HELL OUT OF THE ROUNDABOUT. GO A DIFFERENT WAY. YOU'RE GIVING ME HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE.

If you don't know how to use a roundabout by now, then there's no hope for you. Maybe you should look into a special school, put a chain on your glasses, and apply for social security.

That is all.

Bad/Good Dream

2010-02-19T11:36:00.002-06:00

I had a dream about Sumo the other night. He ran out into the road and got hit by a car. He was so big that he sustained no damage, but the car was a mess.

The dream was really weird. Always in my dreams I am looking for something, searching for something. This one was no different--I was looking for a private bathroom stall.

Not so farfetched, considering that during this past week, I've been sick, and as a result, have been downing massive quantities of water. This, in turn, means I have also been going pee every half hour. It's no wonder I'm having dreams about the bathroom!

Ah, so nice to see my Sumo again, even if it is just in a dream.

Suck It, Valentine's Day

2010-02-12T19:55:00.003-06:00

So on Facebook, everyone is posting photos of themselves with their "sweetheart," how long they've been together, blah blah blah...

Well since I have no desire to hear about how happy these people are with their sweethearts, seeing as my "sweet"heart buggered off with some barfly, I posted a photo of my REAL sweetheart.

Best Valentine ever. God I miss that big stinky guy.

Here's what I wrote on my status: "OK, all you sappy Valentine folks, HERE is a picture of MY "Valentine Sweety." He loved me with everything he had, never yelled at me or treated me like garbage, kissed me every day, and most importantly, HE NEVER CARED HOW FAT I GOT!"

What I really wanted to write was: "SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT YOUR FREAKIN' VALENTINE CRAP. YOU AND YOUR SWEETHEARTS CAN ALL KISS MY ASS."

Obviously I didn't write that, because I'm sure some of the people at my church would not understand my tongue-in-cheek delivery...

Nia Vardalos is in a new movie called "I Hate Valentine's Day." I'm going to find it, and buy it.

Me Talking About Me Again

2010-01-24T17:01:00.002-06:00

I got this as an email, and I think it's freakin' hilarious!

We've seen quite enough of these lame-ass surveys lately, right? And I know you're all sick of the "who will reply first/ how many people are you sending this to/ where did you go?" questions that mean absolutely nothing. So to fight the survey-fatigue, here are some important questions that I think are a little more interesting than knowing what friggin' crayon color you would be.

If you agree and like my questions, go ahead and answer them and send them around to people you feel like sending them to. Then I recommend getting your drink or drug of choice, sit back and wait for those responses to come rolling in!

1) What is one item you would want with you if you were stranded at a monster truck rally? Pepper spray.

2) How old were you when your parents ruined your life by not letting you go hang out the mall when everyone else was, like, allowed to go?
I don't remember ever wanting to go to the mall. I was too busy reading and cultivating my genius to worry about the dumb, popular kids who eventually turned into cautionary tales about eating disorders and high school pregnancy...

3) In the "late night wars" who would you prefer to watch: Lenin or Conan the Barbarian?
I love Conan.

4) What is your favorite cliche they always do in "rom-com" (romantic comedy) movies?
Slapstick. Someone always falls on their face. It's hilarious, even the ten billionth time.

5) If you saw a dead dog on the side of the road, what breed of dog would make you feel the LEAST amount of sadness when you looked closer? In other words, what kind of dog do you dislike?
I don't actively dislike any kind of dog. Unless you count ex-husbands...

6) What is the Soup du Jour? And how much does it cost?
Soup of the Day. Too damn much, considering what it's made of.

7) You see Gary Coleman at the bank. What happens next?
I try to avoid eye contact.

8) What's your favorite TV show that is no longer on the air?
I don't have any favorite TV shows or movies. I miss the A-Team, Airwolf, Macguyver, MST3K, The Tick, In Living Color, The Cosby Show, ALF (yeah, I said it. I liked that show), FIREFLY FIREFLY FIREFLY, Tales From the Crypt, etc. Oh, and the old Incredible Hulk show, the one with Bill Bixby! Maybe some of them are still on, somewhere in the triple digits of pay-per-view. I don't know--I don't have cable.

9) What celebrity of the same sex would you "go gay for" if you had to do that? Sigourney Weaver.

10) What is your favorite kind of storm?
Snowstorm!

11) What was your maternal grandmother's maiden name?
Her maiden name was her last name before she got married to my maternal Grampa.

12) The first time you threw up away from home, where were you?
In bed, at my cousin's house, after many shots of tequila. This was also ten years ago.

13) What was your first cassette tape or CD purchase?
Cassette: Michael Bolton.

14) What was the absolute worst (or stupidest) Halloween costume you ever wore? Many years ago, there was this singing group called the California Raisins (high-five if you remember them). I dressed up as one of them, complete with the white gloves and tennis shoes, in a black trash bag filled with crumpled newspapers. Thinking back, it really wasn't a bad costume, just ridiculous. But I looked very much like a raisin. And when it rained later, I was dry and comfy while everyone else's makeup ran and they ended up looking like John Wayne Gacy.

15) Do you regret not ordering the salad, now that you know more about that soup du jour? At Panera, I always order soup and salad. You can't trick me, nefarious survey.

16) If you were a shampoo, for which hair type would you be formulated?
Normal...maybe? I don't know. What the hell kind of question is that?

17) What would you name a pet turtle, if you could have one? (BTW, Mom says you can't have one, so don't get too excited.)
Yertle. (if you don't "get" that, go read your Dr. Seuss books again, and shame on you for forgetting! )

18) In high school, what was the class you miss the most?
/begin grammar Nazi

This question is worded oddly. It begins in what seems to be the present, with "in high school," implying that you are still "in" high school, switches to past tense, with "was," and then back to present, with "miss." So if I were to answer it the way it is, which possibly implies that I skipped class, I would say I didn't miss any classes. I always went to class. Or you could read it another way, which implies that I did miss a certain class, but that it is possible that I don't miss it any more. Either way, it's confusing. If I answer it the way I think it's supposed to be posed, which would be more appropriately worded:
"Thinking back on high school, what is the class you miss the most?"
My answer would have to be Art.

/end grammar Nazi

19) What was the worst thing you ever did that got you in trouble with your rabbi or tribal shaman? I think this question is for the Catholics. I didn't get in trouble with my pastor/preacher/etc. I only got in trouble with my mom. And even then, I think the worst thing I ever did as a kid was I wrote a note that had the word "fuck" in it. As an adult, the thing that got me in the most trouble was, oddly enough, getting married.

20) Who would you like to take on a cross-country trip in one of those rental RVs? Well, I'd totally love to take my Grandparents (my mother's parents), but they're dead, so in their place, I would probably take my parents. They love trips in rental RVs.

21) Who is your favorite stand-up comedian/enne?
Brian Regan.

22) Are you more likely to cry over physical pain or emotional guilt? Why?
Neither. I don't cry when I get hurt physically, and I don't cry when I feel guilty. I'd be more likely to cry if I was pissed off.

23) Name a book that you know you read, and yet you can't recall a single thing about it other than the title and possibly the author.
Insert the name of any of my Quantitative Methods books from college here.

24) How do you sleep at night?
It depends. Some nights I sleep very well. Other nights, I'm tossing and turning all night. Of course, I sleep better after kickboxing...

25) Why did you do it?
None of your business.

26) Are you sure--absolutely SURE-- there are no surviving witnesses?
I'm like 99% sure.

27) But what about the guy's kids? He had kids, you know.
I think I need to call my attorney...

28) Which is better: rainbows or unicorns?
Unicorns poop rainbows, so obviously you can see which is better...

29) Cake or cupcakes?
Cake! With ice cream!!! Chocolate ice cream!!!!!!

30) Life or death?
Who answers "death" to this question, really? Jack Kevorkian? Edgar Allen Poe? Sylvia Plath? The Heaven's Gate cult? Gah.

Me Talking About Me

2010-01-21T11:03:00.003-06:00

I got this as an email, so I'm deleting all the stuff that doesn't apply to a blog post. Ignore the numerical discrepancies. Enjoy the descriptive and sarcastic information!

1. High heels or boots? Boots.

2. What time did you get up this morning? 9 am

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Leap Year

4. What is your maiden name? Well, when a woman gets married, sometimes she changes her last name to her husband's last name. So if you're a girl, your maiden name is the last name you have before you get married.

5.What is your favorite TV show? Why just one? I like lots of TV shows, like Bones, Star Trek, Twilight Zone, Dr. Who, South Park, Simpsons, etc.

6. What do you usually have for breakfast? Eggs, cereal, oatmeal, toast, milk, whatever.

7. What is your middle name? The name between your first name and your last name.

8. What food do you dislike? Liver

9. Favorite CD at the moment? I just got through a few Coltrane CDs from the library. They were pretty cool. I also like the new Susan Boyle album.

10. What characteristic do you dislike? Dishonesty

11. Favorite Clothing? Jeans

12. If you could jump on a plane/train/automobile right now…where would you travel to and why? Fiji! I've always wanted to go there. Originally thought I'd go there for my honeymoon, but...well...you see how that turned out.

13.Are you an organized person? Yes.

14. Where would you retire to? A small hobby farm in the rolling Iowa hills.

15. What was your most recent memory? What kind of question is that? What was my most recent memory? Asking that question just now was my most recent memory. Typing that last sentence was my most recent memory. I could go on forever, making memories...jeez.

16. What are you going to do when you finish this? Check my laundry

19. When is your birthday? Your birthday is the day on which you were born.

20. Are you a morning person or a night person? Morning

21. What is your shoe size? 7

22. Do you own any animals? No, and it's horrible.

23. Any news you'd like to share? I have a job interview today, and another one tomorrow, but everyone reading this probably already knew that, so it's not really "news."

24. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? A veterinarian.

25. What is your favorite flower? I don't have a favorite flower. I like them all. Even dandelions.

26. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? The day I leave for Fort Jackson.

28. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? I'd be a wax menagerie of all the colors.

29. How is the weather right now? Cold, but not snowy. In my opinion, if it is cold, it should be snowy.

30. Last person you spoke to on the phone? A dude who is buying something from me on craigslist

31. Favorite soft drink? That Cranberry Sierra Mist that they ONLY have at Christmas. Bastards.

33.Hair color? Dark Brown

34. What was your favorite toy as a child? I'm pretty sure I didn't have toys, because I don't remember toys. I remember books. I had books, and a pink bicycle. Oh wait! I remember a sock monkey.

35.Summer or winter? I don't particularly care for either. Too extreme. Give me fall or spring any day.

36.Chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate

37. Coffee or tea? Neither. I'm a hot chocolate girl.

38. Wish you were still young? Young like three, or young like nineteen? I'd like to be nineteen again, so I could avoid all the stupid decisions I've made in the past ten years...

40. When was the last time you cried? I watched "The Women" the other day, and I cried at the end when the baby was born.

41. What is under your bed? Shoes, a witch hat, tray table, ummm some kind of tube pan, and books.

42. What is your favorite cologne or perfume? I don't wear cologne or perfume. I like the smell of soap.

43. What did you do last night? Babysat for some people from my church

44 .What are you afraid of? Stress fractures

45. Best quality you have? Physical or mental? Because I think I'm pretty damn smart, despite the stupid decisions I've made in the past ten years, so I'd like to submit that as my answer. High brain function.

46. How many years at your current job? 1

47. Favorite day of the week? Sunday

50. Do you like finding out all this stuff about your friends? Yes. I have pretty interesting friends.

Movie Reviews

2010-01-17T22:18:00.002-06:00

Movies I have seen recently:

Avatar: Awesome! Go see it. I hear it's awesome in IMAX 3D, so that's next on the list.

Dr. Who: The Green Death: Also awesome! If you like Dr. Who, this is one of the better episodes, in my personal opinion. I think Jon Pertwee is my favorite Doctor! But it's also a happy/sad episode, because Jo Grant leaves the Doctor to marry handsome Welsh scientist and make mushrooms that will revolutionize human food/fuel/etc. and save the planet. But fear not! He meets Sarah Jane Smith shortly afterwards, and they run around blowing up castles!

Sherlock Holmes: Good, but violent! Predictable plot, for those of us who are smart enough to figure out what is going on before the movie explains it all at the end. I liked Jude Law, ironically. Usually I think he's a tool. And I always love Robert Downey, Jr.

The Women: If you're a woman, you'll love it. If you're a man, you won't understand it, and you'll most likely wonder why there are no men in the movie, until you remember that it's called "The WOMEN," not "The MEN." Selfish bastards! Quit thinking of yourselves! Candace Bergen's speech on how it feels when your spouse has an affair are impeccable and poignant. I laughed and cried at the end. I loved it. Because I'm a woman. Duh.

Dr. Who: The Power of Kroll: Awesome! One of the Key to Time series, and not too shabby with the special effects! I almost believed there was a giant octopus-type thing attacking that small model of a refinery in the director's bathtub. Plot needs to be revamped, though. How many Dr. Who episodes are there that depict some backwater planet being selected for colonization or mining, overseen by an overzealous asshole who wants to wipe out all of the natives instead of leave them alone? By the way, I love Romana. Does anyone not love Romana? Sorry to see there was no K-9 in that episode. K-9 was comedic brilliance in The Stones of Blood. Tom Baker and Jon Pertwee are tied for favorite Doctor...

Leap Year: Cute, but shallow. But aren't all romantic comedies? Even He's Just Not That Into You, which I identified with, was predictable and forgettable, despite it's stellar cast. I thought the Irish love interest was cute, in a scruffy sort of way. I wanted to tuck his hair behind his ears the whole time... Amy Adams is adorable.

Evening: Depressing! Gah!! Can't Focus make a movie that ISN'T depressing? Besides P&P, mind you. Atonement was depressing, too, but at least it had a better story. Evening was just a woman remembering something really crappy that happened to her. Good cast, blah story.

After watching Evening, I'm going to have to go watch Mamma Mia! to make myself happy again. Ha! I love ABBA!

Starts With K

2009-08-18T19:18:00.002-05:00

Use the first letter of your last name to answer the following questions.

1. What is your last name - It starts with K, but it will start with B in a few months :)

2. 4 Letter Word - Know

3. A Boys Name - Keith

4. A Girls name - Karry

5. An Occupation - Kinesthesiologist (at first I was like "oh I just made that up" but then I looked it up, and it's a real occupation. I was in a hospital on Friday I probably saw it on the wall)

6. A Color - Kelly Green

7. Something you wear - Kilt

8. A Beverage - Killian's

9. A Food - Kimchee

10. Something found in the bathroom - Kotex (sorry, guys--it was the first thing that came to mind)

11. A place - Kansas

12. A Reason for being late - Kids

13. Something you shout - Kill! (hey, I was considering the Marines--it's what they do)

Do it if you would like, post it on your blog, and put the link in my comment section so I can read it. Enjoy!

Why I Love Shakira

2009-08-08T21:02:00.002-05:00

Because she's FREAKIN' AWESOME.

I was at Wal-Mart lastnight and it was all I could do not to look for/buy the newest Shakira album. I love her new single!

----------
She Wolf

SOS shes in disguise
SOS shes in disguise
There's a she wolf in disguise
Coming out coming out coming out

A domesticated girl thats all you ask of me
Darling it is no joke this is lycanthropy
The moon's awake now with eyes wide open
My body's craving so feed the hungry

Ive been devoting myself to you Monday to Monday and Friday to Friday
Not getting enough retribution or decent incentives to keep me at it
Im starting to feel just a little abused like a coffee machine in an office
So Im gonna go to my closet and get me a lover and tell you all about it

Theres a she wolf in the closet
Open up and set it free
Theres a she wolf in the closet
Let it out so it can breathe

Sitting across a bar staring right at her prey
Its going well so far shes gonna get her way
Nocturnal creatures are not so prudent
The moon's my teacher and Im her student

To locate the single men I got on me a special radar
And the fire department hotline in case I get in trouble later
Not looking for cute little divos or rich city guys I just want to enjoy
By having a very good time and behave very bad in the arms of a boy

Theres a she wolf in the closet
Open up and set it free
Theres a she wolf in the closet
Let it out so it can breathe

SOS shes in disguise
SOS shes in disguise
Theres a she wolf in disguise
Coming out coming out coming out

SOS shes in disguise
SOS shes in disguise
Theres a she wolf in disguise
Coming out coming out coming out

Theres a she wolf in the closet, let it out so it can breathe
----------

If I was a she-wolf, I can think of some people whose eyes I'd rip out right now. Or maybe their lying tongues...

Ah, but that's another blog, in a galaxy far, far away...

A Meme, and Some Photos!

2009-07-09T19:48:00.008-05:00

Or vice versa.

So Sumo and I took a walk the other day and there are some big dogs that like to come see us when we walk past. They are in a large fenced yard, and Sumo always tries to squeeze into the fence to see them! They are friendly, and very tolerant of our presence at the outskirts of their yard. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that we carry an apple with us when we walk... But I took a photo of our friends the last time we were down there.

For your enjoyment, the two Big Dogs.

Curious creatures, no? Sumo wonders what breed of dog they are. I tell him not to worry about it.

A friend's house has a bush right next to their driveway, and one day I happened to see a bird's nest in the bush. It's a fairly small bush, so I didn't expect there to be any birds in it, but what did I see when I looked closer...

If I'm not mistaken, those are Robin eggs! I was right, because...

...a week or two later, I pulled into the drive and when I got out of the car, the mama Robin was snuggled into the nest. She flew off when she saw me, so I took a look at what she was guarding. The eggs were gone, and in their place, three tiny bodies. I didn't get too close because the mama Robin was hollering at me when I took photos, but here you can see their fragile little selves--so small!

A few weeks later, three open mouths greet me as I pull into the driveway.

A week or so later, bigger birds, mouths still open. They grew SO FAST.

And another week passes, I find an empty nest. But if you look closely, you can see one of the little guys perched on a branch below the nest. I didn't see him until I took the photo. He flitted off as soon as I had snapped the pic, and sat underneath my car for a while before he was brave enough to get out of there.

Interesting what you find when you take the time to look, eh?

Oh, and I've been told that the drawing below is a heart with a K in it, and it means "I love Katie." A six-year-old told me that. It was so sweet.

Here is the aforementioned meme:

Four, Four, Four, Four...

A) Four places that I go to over and over:
WalMart (who doesn't??? ), my kickboxing/Jiujitsu academy, the local movie theatre, and Coldstone Creamery (again, who doesn't????? )

B) Four people who e-mail me regularly:
Jen, my recruiter, Ben, and some guy named Jose who wants me to enlarge my penis. I keep emailing Jose back, "I don't HAVE a penis to enlarge! Send me some breast enlarger pills instead!"

C) Four favorite smells:
Lilac, baking bread, fresh cut grass, and chocolate

D) Four places I would rather be right now:
The library, the YMCA, the movies, or that awesome club we went to in Killarney--it was TOTALLY awesome, wasn't it? Remember when they played all those George Michaels songs and we were like "WTF??!!!" that was hilarious Hahahaaa!!!!

But I digress...

E) Four TV shows that I watch:
Bones, Firefly (they don't have to be TV shows that are on right now do they? ), Doctor Who, and The Simpsons

There. Now you know everything.

Random Crap

2009-05-10T15:39:00.003-05:00

So I saw "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" last Sunday. Awesome. Did anyone mention that Hugh Jackman is nekkid in it? He is! Nekkid!!! Heeee!!!! Uh...and the movie was good, too...good umm...cinematography and stuff... Deadpool is in it. Who knew??? I didn't even know that Deadpool was in the X-Men comics. Ryan Reynolds--who I love--plays Deadpool. I am SO seeing his solo movie when it comes out. Maybe he'll be nekkid in it too.

THEN I saw STAR TREK on Friday night. AWESOMENESS. I will admit that I was afraid that it would suck. But it didn't. Even my friend who went with me--and is NOT a Star Trek fan--enjoyed it! Karl Urban made a freakin' awesome Bones! Even his speech and mannerisms were spot-on!

Yes, I am a Star Trek fan. Sue me.

My haircut didn't happen yesterday. While I was tanning, I got a phone call from the salon asking if I could reschedule. My stylist wasn't feeling well. I said that was OK, and I would reschedule for next Saturday.

Part of me is enjoying the longer hair, but the athelete in me is tired of trying to think of ways to keep it out of my eyes. Part of me enjoys having swooshy hair that I can swish it and stuff, but the athelete in me doesn't want to have to worry about that. Part of me loves the fact that it curls into little ringlets and is beautiful, but the athelete in me is tired of the wet mop that's on top of my head when I get done working out.

(yeah, I know, I'm thinking the same thing! who knew there was an athelete in here with me???!!! )

The fight lastnight was awesome, by the way. Lots of dudes, some chicks. I sold general admission tickets at the door and then went in and watched the fight from the floor. Because I worked the fight, I got to go wherever I wanted, which was awesome. Didn't get home till the wee hours of the morning. Very tired. But all in all, a good day yesterday.

KATIEFUCIOUS SMA...er...RUN!!

2009-05-09T10:35:00.003-05:00

I am actually starting to enjoy running. I used to hate it. Maybe I didn't have the right motivation. (evil ex-husbands will do that for you) I did the Run for Shelter 5M today. See that "M"? It means MILE. This weren't no piddly 5K, boys and girls. This was 5 freakin' miles. And I ran the WHOLE DAMN THING.

I was one of the last people to finish, but dammit, I RAN. AND I DIDN'T DIE.

STILL ALIVE, BITCHES!!!

So now that I've confirmed that I can actually run for more than ten feet without dying, it's time to do some speed work. I'm woefully slow, and that needs to change. I did some research after my most recent ranty post about people who run/walk the 5Ks, and some friends have enlightened me as to interval training, and how it helps you become faster, but doesn't necessarily do anything for your endurance.

I think I have the endurance thing down. Just need to go faster. I have the desire...and of course the SHOES. (if you're going to run, you HAVE TO HAVE THE SHOES--my shoe of choice is the Brooks Adrenaline GTS 9--these shoes are EFFING AWESOME--I'm going to buy like three more pairs for OCS)

Another 5K in a week. Maybe I can shave a few minutes off my time. I'm certainly shaving inches off my waistline... I've lost 40 lbs in the past six months! Wheeeeee!!!

And speaking of shaving, how do people run with all that hair?? I'm so tired of the wet mop that is on top of my head after every workout session, I'm getting it all cut off today. Maybe I'll dye it blue...

You know what the best thing was at the race today? (other than finishing) After I crossed the finish line, I wasn't even winded. I mean, I was a little winded, but like "I just walked up three flights of stairs" winded. Definitely NOT "I just ran 5 miles" winded--I thought I was going to be heaving and panting. I remarked on it as I was calmly eating my post-race banana, and thinking, "gee, I should be breathing pretty hard right now, and spewing half-chewed banana chunks everywhere." But I wasn't. And I didn't. And I'm sure the people around me were grateful. I was pretty psyched about that. I also got a form to sign up for the Calumet Region Striders. But I'm going to sign up with my post-divorce name, so don't look for me under my married name. Or my maiden name. This is a whole other name--and it's awesome.

Run the whole thing, you jerks

2009-04-26T22:08:00.003-05:00

Disclaimer: the following is my opinion. If you are easily offended...well...quit being easily offended, you pansy.

So a 5K is supposed to be a race, right? If you sign up to run, you should run, right? Run 5 kilometers. Why do people register for these damn races and then do the whole sprint, walk, sprint, walk, sprint, walk bullshit? They sprint 100 feet, and walk 500 feet, sprint 100 feet, walk 500 feet, etc. It's retarded.

I thought the purpose of running 3.1 miles was so that you could get some kind of circulatory benefit from it. Like endurance-based. What benefit do you get from short intervals of sprinting? I ran the whole damn thing with a pulled calf muscle and a plantar wart, and I think I got more out of it than the moron who sprinted past me at the 2 mile mark and then speed-walked the last three quarters of a mile. Half these people got better times than I did, and they walked the majority of the 5 kilometers.

Is it just me? Is there some kind of endurance-based benefit that I don't know about? Because to me, it just seems like a bullshit way to run a race. If you can call it "running" at all... Stop to walk if you must, but I'm going to keep running. After all, I signed up to RUN.

After this weekend's 5K--at which I will mention I took FOUR MINUTES off my previous time--I was looking for the bananas. I like bananas after I run. I saw a lady who looked like she knew where stuff was, and said "BANANAS!!!" I think I scared her a little, because her eyes got really big and she just pointed to a tent...

We did not stay for awards. I am still too slow to expect to win anything in my age group. Thirty seconds after we pulled away, it started POURING. I'm so glad I ran fast. Or rather, in my case, semi-fast...and I ran the WHOLE 3.1 MILES, YOU CANDY-ASS SPRINT/WALKERS.

May 9, wish me luck on my 5-MILE run. Not 5 kilometers, FIVE MILES. And at the end of July, I signed up for the BIX 7. Seven miles of awesomeness. GRRRAAAAGH!!! KATIEFUCIOUS SMASH!!!

Tomorrow evening is my UFC class, and I'm psyched to wear my new pink mouthguard and pink gel wristwraps. It's going to be awesome. I'm totally going to punch some stuff.

Tuesday afternoon is my (hopefully last) meeting with the attorneys to work out the details of the divorce. It's going to be awesome. I'm totally going to punch some stuff. Just kidding about the punching part. I'm sure I'll want to punch some stuff, though... Hopefully we can work out an agreement, stay out of court, and FILE THIS BITCH so I can get a damn divorce, already. I'm totally ready to change my name...

Movie Reviews, Special for You

2009-04-12T15:42:00.002-05:00

I have seen several movies lately. Don't get all weird on me--I actually love watching movies. Almost as much as I love reading books. Would you like to hear about the movies I have seen lately? Of course you would!!!

In the theatre:

Knowing: not what I thought it was going to be, but good just the same! I liked it. Nicolas Cage plays an astrophysicist, and reminded me of my favorite college English teacher. Interesting premise, slightly off-base ending that was unexpected, but like I said, interesting.

A Haunting in Connecticut: Awesome!!! A friend of mine and I go to see movies every weekend, and we are both horror fans. This one didn't disappoint. There were creepy parts, jump out of your seat parts, the end was interesting. I definitely recommend it to anyone who likes a good suspense/horror flick.

Watchmen: Never read the graphic novel (although I am on the lookout for it now), but thought the movie was excellent. At first, I was wearing the big WTF face, but after talking to a few friends about the story, I think I understand it a little better. Avoid if giant blue naked men make you squeamish.

Confessions of a Shopaholic: LOVED IT!!! Imagine me saying that while at the same time giggling, jumping up and down, and squee-ing. I have nothing to say about this movie that a man would understand, so if you have a penis, please stop reading. The entire movie was about one woman's struggle against her shopping addiction. It is heartwarming, and I TOTALLY LOVED IT. I love Isla Fisher!!!!

He's Just Not That Into You: Jennifer Connelly's storyline parallels my own almost exactly. Watch the movie, and think of me when she finally makes the right choice at the end. Have I ever told you how much I love Jennifer Aniston? All the storylines are adorable, and I loved it.

On DVD:

Quarantine: "28 Days Later" meets "Dawn of the Dead" (the new one). If you like zombie movies, or movies where one person gets infected with something, turns all feral, bites someone else and incites an epidemic, killing and/or maiming everyone else in the story, rent it. If you're tired of the same old, same old, skip this one. It was mediocre.

The Dark Knight: Ummm....you can hate me for saying it, but I thought it was OK. Very messy. Whatever happened to the singleminded good guy of the good old days? The Joker was bad, Batman was good, and Batman takes care of the bad guys. It was all over the place--a million things going on. I felt like I'd have to watch the thing seventeen times before I finally got a good hold on what was going on.

(not that there aren't movies that I have watched a hundred times of my own free will. they were just that good)

Maybe I should just watch it again? I don't have a whole lot of time to watch movies all week, but it's been long enough that it shouldn't be too expensive at Wal-Mart. I already own Batman Begins and all prior Batman movies (except Batman & Robin--I don't think anyone considers that a valid attempt). I should finish the collection, right?

Step Brothers: Ten minutes in, I turned it off. Lame.

The Happening: Wow! What a great movie! I really thought it was...OH WAIT! I haven't SEEN it yet, though I have rented it TWO TIMES. The first time I rented it, the disc wouldn't play, so I took it back and they gave me what I thought was a working disc (for free, mind you). I think that maybe the moron at the counter handed me the same disc a second time, because it STILL WON'T PLAY. Jesus, people. Don't you have to have a high school education to hold a job any more?

Twilight: I really like the movie. It is not as good as the books, but it is in my DVD player often. No, I am NOT a fangirl. I happened to enjoy the books very much. I bought the DVD because it was a freakin' 2-day rental at Blockbuster, and I thought that was lame, so I went to Wal-Mart and picked it up. It is a melodramatic, teen-angsty-love-story-type-thing and it's good background noise. I like the soundtrack as well. Plus, the dude who plays Edward is pretty easy on the eyes. I am looking forward to what they do with the other three books.

You know, one of the things I liked the most about the Twilight books was that they were tame enough for young readers, hence the movie was tame enough as well. Why do directors/producers think that they have to use so much profanity in movies nowadays? Can't they just write a script that doesn't include the f-word?

There are more movies I could tell you about, but I don't have all day. You'll just have to wait until I feel like writing about them. Happy Easter!

Read It

2009-04-05T15:30:00.000-05:00

THIS BLOG IS AWESOME

Puts things into perspective, no? :)

Real World Applications of Calculus

2009-03-24T14:06:00.001-05:00

HAHAHAAA!!!!!

see more pwn and owned pictures

I'm Awesome

2009-03-14T11:59:00.002-05:00

I went on a date lastnight. It was very pleasant. I had forgotten how much fun it is to be out with someone who actually WANTS to be out with you...

Actually I went on two dates.

My therapist had suggested I get back out there, so I put up a profile on one of those dating websites. I got quite a few hits (because I'm awesome), and had been chit-chatting with some nice gentlemen. I scheduled a walk in the park with one of them, which was a lot of fun. He brought wine, I brought cheese. It was sweet.

When I got home, I got a phone call from one of the other guys I had been talking to, and since it was still early (8:30 is still early, right?), we went to the casino and hung out. It was fun. :)

Tonight I am going to the movies. On a date. Again. With one of the guys from lastnight.

It's really weird going on "dates" while I'm still legally married, but I figure since there is zero chance of me getting back together with my STBX, it's not a big deal. Only a matter of time.

Wish me luck.

My Apologies

2009-03-08T17:02:00.002-05:00

1. For taking so long to update this blog.

2. To those of you who told me to try a 5K, I am sorry I did not do it sooner!!! Saturday was the Foot Pursuit at Sunset Hill Park, and IT WAS AWESOME. I was tired, wet, and covered in mud when I crossed the finish, but I had SO MUCH FUN. I walked it, which took me about an hour (I am still working on the whole "running three miles" thing). I signed up for another at the beginning of April--which I will RUN--and another at the end of April in MC--which I will also run. Wish me luck!

3. To those of you who recommended the Twilight books to me, I am sorry I did not read them sooner. I had the first book for months, and finally started reading it a few days ago. I could NOT put it down! Same with New Moon--read it in about five hours at home one night. Today I went out and bought Eclipse and Breaking Dawn and will have devoured them by the end of the week. Good reads!

4. To my cuticles, which I have sadly neglected, you are now pushed back with a nice coat of paint. Enjoy.

5. To anyone allergic or made nauseous by the scent of Banana Laffy Taffy, I apologize. My new shampoo/body wash/bubble bath (yes all three in one bottle!!! ) is Banana, and it smells DEE-EFFING-LICIOUS. I loves it.

6. To my old jeans which are too big for me now, you go to the Goodwill box. Have a nice life.

To anyone I might have missed, consider yourself included. (except for my STBX--he does not deserve any apologies from me)

Yep

2009-02-23T06:47:00.002-06:00

A friend sent me this video. Keenly appreciated, as I believe that someday my ex will feel acute regret...I kinda feel sorry for the guy. He just won't accept that his own decisions are what makes his life so difficult. It's just too easy to blame someone else.

YouTube Video

Lyrics to You'll Think of Me by Keith Urban

I woke up early this morning around 4am
With the moon shining bright as headlights on the interstate
I pulled the covers over my head and tried to catch some sleep
But thoughts of us kept keeping me awake
Ever since you found yourself in someone else's arms
I've been tryin' my best to get along
But that's OK
There's nothing left to say, but

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me

I went out driving trying to clear my head
I tried to sweep out all the ruins that my emotions left
I guess I'm feeling just a little tired of this
And all the baggage that seems to still exist
It seems the only blessing I have left to my name
Is not knowing what we could have been
What we should have been
So

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

Someday I'm gonna run across your mind
Don't worry, I'll be fine
I'm gonna be alright
While you're sleeping with your pride
Wishing I could hold you tight
I'll be over you
And on with my life

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need'em
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need'em
Take your space and all your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we got nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me, yeah

And you're gonna think of me
Oh someday baby, someday

Poignant Words

2009-02-12T07:54:00.002-06:00

I play church league volleyball, just FYI.

Was sitting on the bleachers last week with a teammate, and talking about things. We got on the topic of relationships, and I mentioned that I didn't want to get married again.

She said that if she was in the same boat, she would feel the same way. And then she said something to me that I have been thinking about ever since.

"You know, people say there are plenty of fish in the sea, but I don't think the problem is finding someone. That part is easy. The problem is finding someone who is willing to work. Someone who is willing to put in the effort to make the relationship work."

How true!!! This is the ONLY reason I believe my marriage ended. No matter what excuses he may give to anyone, or the stupid crap he says he had to put up with, it all came down to the fact that HE WASN'T WILLING TO WORK ON IT. Sometimes I tell people he "quit the marriage." He made a choice to stop making the effort.

And a marriage can't survive if only one person is doing all the work.

I was on the treadmill at the gym this morning, and this All American Rejects song was on VH1 (I love it!!). It made me happy to listen to it:

I wake up every evening
With a big smile on my face
And it never feels out of place.
And you're still probably working
At a 9 to 5 pace
I wonder how bad that tastes

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell

Now where's your picket fence love
And where's that shiny car
Did it ever get you far?
You ever seem so dead slow
Never seen you fall so hard
Do you know where you are?

Truth be told I miss you
Truth be told I'm lying

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
If you find a man thats worth the damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool you're just as well hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell

Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself
Where did it all go wrong?
But the list goes on and on
Truth be told I miss you
Truth be told I'm lying

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
If you find a man that's worth the damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool you're just as well hope it gives you hell

Now you'll never see
What you've done to me
You can take back your memories
They're no good to me
And here's all your lies
If you look me in the eyes
With the sad, sad look
That you wear so well

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
If you find a man that's worth the damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool you're just as well hope it gives you hell

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell (hope it gives you hell)
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell (hope it gives you hell)
When you hear this song and you sing along well you'll never tell
And you're the fool I've just as well I hope it gives you hell
When you hear this song I hope that it will give you hell
You can sing along I hope that it puts you through hell

TWC

2009-02-06T22:54:00.003-06:00

For those of you who know what I'm referring to, I'm Confession #2793. It took them a while to post it (I wrote it about a month ago), but they eventually got around to it. :)

Enjoy!

(with profanity filters on, if your kids are around)

I Married an Asshole

2009-01-21T21:11:00.001-06:00

I can't wait to be rid of this man. He never ceases to amaze me with his assholery. I have never been treated so horribly by anyone, EVER, in my entire life.

I got an email today from his son, who I still conversed with, saying that his dad didn't want him talking to me any more, and that it was probably better if we didn't talk.

That hurt. It really hurt. I love those kids...

The way that man can continue to hurt me...it is unfathomable. What an awful human being.

And I keep asking myself how I got mixed up with such a horrible person. Was my judgment just really bad at that point in my life? Or, as I suspect, was he just really good at lying?

October can't come soon enough...

Now I Understand It!

2009-01-20T16:20:00.002-06:00

When I was younger, I could never figure out why so many people liked that Alanis Morissette song "You Oughta Know." Of course, in my own defense, I was like 15 when the song came out. I knew that it was a breakup song. But I never REALLY understood until I read the lyrics the other day. Now I know why they all loved it. And now I love it. And I love Alanis Morissette.

Video posted after lyrics. Enjoy.

I want you to know, that I'm happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
An older version of me
Is she perverted like me
Would she go down on you in a theatre
Does she speak eloquently
And would she have your baby
I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

'cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, till you died
But you're still alive

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful
I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me Mr. Duplicity
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you fuck her?

'cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, til you died
But you're still alive

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

'cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me
And I'm not gonna fade
As soon as you close your eyes and you know it
And every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back
I hope you feel it...well can you feel it

Well, I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

Alanis Morissette - New Music - More Music Videos

Star Wars, in Girly-land

2009-01-20T16:02:00.001-06:00

Thanks to Craig for the hilarious video!

Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it) from Joe Nicolosi on Vimeo.

Hint: It's Not About an Octopus

2009-01-15T14:14:00.001-06:00

I love Jonathan Coulton. No really. I love him. LOVE.

Octopus

I still remember the words you said
They were hard enough to leave a mark
And now they echo inside my head
As I spiral down into the dark
I windmill upside down
Knowing you’ll come at me again
And I feel your shadow pass above me

Octopus
Some kind of octopus
Tearing my shell apart
Letting the sea get in
You make my insides outside

I don’t think I ever saw you blink
You were so controlled that no one knew
And by the time we all stopped to think
We were already too close to you
Now you keep coming by
Telling me it’s not what I think
But I know a murder when I see one

Octopus
Some kind of octopus
Tearing my shell apart
Letting the sea get in
You make my insides outside

And far above me I can see the world
Receding slowly out of view
The sinking feeling that my worst mistake
Was all the time I spent with you

You said you’re sorry you said you’d try
But you never did, I guess we’re done
Now bits of pieces of me float by
And I die in front of everyone
And you’re already gone
Halfway to wherever you sleep
And you make me wish I never met you

Octopus
Some kind of octopus
Tearing my shell apart
Letting the sea get in
You make my insides outside..

Requiem

2009-01-15T08:16:00.002-06:00

I'm offended that the MSN article doesn't mention Star Trek at all.

Bastards.

I loved Ricardo Montalban.

R.I.P. KHAN

It's Not Just Bush...

2009-01-13T14:05:00.002-06:00

I have to say something about the recent Israel vs. Hamas bullshit that is going on in the media...

There is a lot of anti-Israel pressure going on, people crying out for Israel to stop their horrible bombings in Gaza...

Well let me tell you something, folks. THEY STARTED IT. That's right. They ALWAYS start it! There is always pressure on Israel to keep the peace, and they DO. They have never launched a pre-emptive strike against Hamas or the Palestinians. It has ALWAYS been in retaliation for missiles that Hamas launches into Israel FIRST.

You want to know why Israel is being so ruthless? Because they're tired of these chickenshit Hamas bozos breaking the treaties and agreements, and they want the crap to STOP. Every time rockets are launched from Gaza into Israel, there is pressure on Israel to do nothing, because we know that once Israel starts to fight back, there will be biased media coverage, JUST LIKE THERE IS NOW.

See this?

It's not just Bush. They hate America! And all AMERICANS, even blessed Barack Obama (hallowed be His name), and because America supports Israel, they hate Israel by proxy. They hated Israel first, though, so I suppose you should say that because America supports Israel, they hate America by proxy. They're all ethnocentric bastards.

GET IT RIGHT.

I Am. He Isn't.

2009-01-09T13:36:00.002-06:00

I continue to find it ironic that I am heading towards a commission in one of the most elite forces in the world, whose motto is "Semper Fidelis."

Latin for "Always Faithful," the irony strikes me when I think about my STBX. How I was "semper fidelis," and he wasn't. Ever. To anyone.

And I can't guarantee that if I see him on a street corner once I'm a Second Lieutenant, I won't walk up to him, scream "SEMPER FI," and kick him in the balls.

Just the thought makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!

Contemplating

2009-01-08T07:39:00.003-06:00

First, I would like to say that whoever made the anonymous comment about the guitar strings...I like the way you think...

I was thinking of something lastnight.

I always considered STBX to be a good father. He spends time with his kids, makes it a point to attend their events, supports them when they need it...but really, how good a dad is he?

I mean, he's basically lived his life in such a way as to present the example to his kids that it's ok to toss away a HUMAN BEING if you get tired of them. Really, isn't that all he has done during his various marriages/relationships? And what kind of example does that set for his kids?

I wonder what he would think if he knew how much his decisions really hurt his children.

I wonder if he would even care.

It struck me then, as I was thinking that particular thought right there...

My dad left my mom when she was pregnant with me. A few years later, he got married to a nice woman, they had two kids, and are still married today! I have always maligned my dad as being the man who abandoned my mom, and never really wanted to be part of his life because of it.

Why did I then choose to marry someone who had done almost the exact same thing to not one but TWO women?

That I cannot answer for you. All I can tell you is that he talks a good game. I remember when we were dating, getting some kind of "I drew a line in the sand" bullshit, and believing it.

Now some other woman is gullible enough to believe it. Poor girl. If she only knew.

Since he has left me, I have gotten a good taste of how often he lies. He lies to me about everything. While we were married, I asked him if he had quit smoking. He said yes. I found out only a few months ago that he never really quit.

I asked him when he left me if he would please refrain from starting any new relationships until the divorce was final. He said he would not start any new relationships.

Well you can see how long that lasted. A total of about twenty seconds, apparently.

He said he would be staying at his parents' house. His parents would call me, looking for him, saying that he's not there, nobody knows where he is. Well now we know who he's been shacking up with...

He got a new cell phone and cell phone number shortly after he left me, saying that he "just didn't want to be on the same cell phone plan as me any more." Why doesn't he just be honest about it? He didn't want me to see who he was calling, because he was calling his girlfriend.

He told me that he is going to move in with his parents.

I call bullshit. I think he is probably going to take the kids there when he has them, and move in with his girlfriend.

What a bastard.

And what a bad example to set for your children.

Turning your back on your spouse is the ultimate lie, and he said those vows once to his first wife, once to his second wife, and TWICE to me. Liar, liar, liar, liar...

And how can he be oblivious to the fact that he is losing their respect? That in and of itself would deter me...losing the respect of your child is a dangerous thing...and do to it so flippantly, like it's no big deal...

So yeah, I'm changing my opinion of what kind of father he is. He's a good dad when people are watching. All other times...well...you can see what kind of example he's set for these two great kids. It's just sad to watch their reactions to all this and know that they are hurting too.

If he doesn't care about me, it's one thing. But not caring about hurting them? Lying to them? Lying to his parents? Jesus...

Well, as my friend Roseanne says, Karma's A Bitch.

Lawyer Up

2009-01-06T19:37:00.001-06:00

I just found out that my STBX didn't just leave me.

He left me for another woman.

So now, when people ask me what happened, I can say "He left me for another woman," instead of what I normally say, which is "He left me."

Exciting, huh?

This changes everything...see post title for details...

Things I Think are Stupid

2009-01-01T16:15:00.002-06:00

In 2009, there are some things that I think we should get rid of.

1. Speed limits.
Nobody follows them anyways. People either go way too fast or they go 20 miles below the speed limit and piss me off. Just get rid of them. Look how happy the Germans are!

2. Indiana Blue Laws.
Lame. 'Nuf said.

3. Online Applications with personality tests.
Am I the only person who hates these??? I am job hunting right now, and it seems like NOONE has paper applications any more. They're all online, and to apply, you have to take this bajillion-question personality test. I took a screenie of the last one I filled out, but I can't find it or I would show it to you. Takes a damn half hour just to click all the bubbles. FREAKIN' AWFUL. Whatever happened to in-person interviews? Are we too lazy to do that now???

4. BSL.
Did you know that the city of Denver, Colorado declared that all American Pit Bull Terriers were dangerous dogs and therefore needed to be put to sleep? They banned the breed, and according to this article, were euthanizing them at a rate of THREE PER DAY!!! Three years later, 1600 dogs are dead due to the law. Many fanciers will tell you that in reality, what most people call a "pit bull" is probably not a representative of the breed, they only see a typical body shape or wide head and maintain the IGNORANT and INCORRECT assumption that any dog that resembles a Bull breed is aggressive and will kill you.

BSL does not correct the problem. It only punishes responsible owners for doing the right thing. If a person is honest and licenses their dog as a pit bull, they are targeted not only by the law, but by insurance companies, which charge higher premiums to pit bull owners (or Akita owners, for that matter). The people that are causing the problem will continue to breed the dogs, and train them to attack other dogs, and inadvertently, they will attack humans as well. They will continue to break the law while the honest people suffer the loss of their best friends.

According to the American Temperament Testing Society, APBTs achieved higher-than-average passing scores! 84.3%, higher than Chihuahua, Lhasa Apso, JRTs, Toy Poodles, Papillon, Pomeranian, Shih Tzu, AND Yorkshire Terriers, ALL smaller breeds that noone would consider "dangerous."

Go figure. Just because a dog is big doesn't mean it will be dangerous, and just because a dog is small doesn't mean it will be friendly! A friend of mine has a pit mix, and she is THE sweetest (although sometimes painfully enthusiastic) dog that I have ever met. I am not afraid of her. Anyone who ever met our Pearl knows that not all Akitas are aggressive. Pearl wouldn't bite you if your hand was made of cheese. Humans teach a dog to be aggressive. They aren't born that way.

Punish the deed, not the breed people.

Happy 2009!

Husband Fail

2008-12-23T11:45:00.002-06:00

From FailBlog. I just couldn't resist!!

see more pwn and owned pictures

Don't give me any ideas, Emily...

Life Goes On

2008-12-15T19:06:00.003-06:00

What an odd feeling, getting rid of old stuff. Something that was once so valuable loses all sentimentality when there are bad feelings associated with it instead of good feelings.

I pawned my rings today.

It made me sad. I wanted to get rid of them, since they are now just a reminder of what no longer exists. They weren't extremely valuable. They were simple. I didn't even pick them out. My STBX did. He did a good job, too, because they fit perfectly, and I liked them. Now when I look at them all I can think of are all the promises that he made, and subsequently broke...

Ah well, but life goes on. These made me smile this evening. I hope they make you smile too. Enjoy.

more animals

more animals

see more puppies

...or woman's best friend...

Last but not least, my friends, THIS is why you should pay attention in English class, or else you may be wearing your stupidity on your body for all to see, for the rest of your life...

see more pwn and owned pictures

Spelling is important.

Hope you are all having a good week.

sigh

2008-12-08T18:08:00.003-06:00

I will keep in touch with the kids to the best of my ability, but I swear to God, I hope I never EVER see their father again after this is all over.

How can someone who was supposed to love you and take care of you become so horrible?? Makes me wonder who I married.

Who is that man? I don't even recognize him any more.

I used to think he was a nice person.

Not so much now.

New YouTube Account

2008-12-08T08:48:00.002-06:00

For those of you who are interested, my new YouTube username is LunzieBakey. Feel free to subscribe, or just watch the videos, whatever. I have started to re-upload the videos from the old account to the new account, and hopefully they will all be finished by the end of the day.

Because this is MY account now, I may upload more than just dog videos. I have some cute ones of my cousin's youngest, Molly. Enjoy! :)

WTF?

2008-12-06T13:20:00.002-06:00

Apparently you're not allowed to exercise your right to run your own business the way you want to any more.

Read the article.

Does that sound to anyone else like the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard? Gee, and here I thought that people had a right to choose in this country. You can choose to have an abortion. You can choose to be gay. You can choose whose wedding you take pictures of...oh no wait. You can't.

What if they were Jewish people, and the Christian photographers didn't want to take their wedding photos because of that? First of all, I doubt they Jewish people would have sued...second of all, IT'S THEIR OWN DAMN BUSINESS!!! They can run it however they want to! What's next? Are we going to start forcing Christian churches to embrace homosexuality, something that is clearly opposed in the most basic tenets of the faith?

Does anyone else think this sounds like a setup? Like the homosexual couple knew that these people were Christians, and was just trying to figure out some reason to hassle them? Because that's what it sounds like to me...

What the photographers did wasn't discrimination. They were making a choice, which I thought we were still allowed to do here in America.

When did we stop being able to stand for our beliefs?

TMI

2008-12-04T16:31:00.003-06:00

A few nights ago, at about 10 p.m., I received a text message that basically looked like this "FW: FW: FW: FW: >>SOMEONE YOU KNOW LIKES> YOU IF YOU DON'T FORWARD THIS ON TO 10 PEOPLE YOU WILL HAVE A BAD DAY!!!!!!1 >>

I didn't recognize the number. Who sent me this? I was determined to find out. This is the actual text message conversation transcribed from my phone. For the sake of anonymity, let's call our little friend "Kim." Anywhere I use her real name in the conversation I will replace with [Kim].

Me: Who is this?

Kim: [Kim] how did u not kno that?

Me: [resisting the urge to correct her spelling] [Kim] who?

Kim: [gives me her full name, first AND last]

Me: [sigh] I think you have the wrong number [Kim].

Kim: Ya haha vry funny!

Me: Who do you think this is?

Kim: Idk who is this??

Me: Why are you texting me if you don't know who I am?

Kim: Cuz i thought i had this girl [insert girl's FULL NAME here]'s number! So u gonna tell me who u r??

Me: Then I suggest you ask your friend [name] what her REAL number is.

Kim: Ok THEN!!!

Me: Nice chatting with you [Kim].

Kim: Ya nice chatting with u ??????? Oh that's rite i dont know ur name!!

Me: Shouldn't you be asleep by now?

Kim: No well heres the story im on vacation in nevada and its only 8:00 there time so the question is shouldnt u be asleep??

Me: Maybe if I was still in high school, but I think I'm a bit old for a curfew now.

Kim: Ok

....then I texted her this.

Me: Do me a favor [Kim]--don't give out so much of your personal info. It's dangerous, especially when you don't know who you're talking to.

Kim: Ok well u sorda jst scared me so im gonna stop txting u. goodebye.

I did not text her back, for fear of having the police called on me...but I really do hope I scared her! I hope I scared the living shit out of her! Young girls (and she was obviously a young girl) should NOT be giving out ANY information via text messaging. It's freakin' DANGEROUS!!!

Hopefully one girl learned a lesson. I thought about calling her directly and telling her who I was, explaining it to her, but she's probably like twelve and would never remember it the next day...

Sometimes

2008-12-01T15:46:00.001-06:00

Sometimes it seems like all I do some days is cry and pack. Pack and cry...

Photorefractive Keratectomy

2008-11-29T10:15:00.003-06:00

FASCINATING

Been considering PRK to fix the eyes. What an amazing thing, the Excimer laser! Thank you, Russians!

My favorite part:

"Rather than burning or cutting material, the excimer laser adds enough energy to disrupt the molecular bonds of the surface tissue, which effectively disintegrates into the air in a tightly controlled manner through ablation rather than burning. Thus excimer lasers have the useful property that they can remove exceptionally fine layers of surface material with almost no heating or change to the remainder of the material which is left intact."

Amazing!! It doesn't actually "burn away" any organic material--it injects energy by combining several gases (Argon, Flouride, and another halogen) in order to break the molecular bonds to quite literally "vaporize" the tissue! No heat, no smell of burning flesh, just a bunch of atoms floating away from your corneal stroma. Wow.

It's pricey--about $2000 per eye, give or take a few hundred--but would pay for itself after a few years, considering I spend about $500/year on glasses/contact lenses/eye exams.

How will I pay for it, you ask? Well, my parents have offered me a chunk of my Grandparent's estate, and I have requested this.

I will, of course, post a play-by-play when I actually have it done.
Excitement!

An Actual Conversation

2008-11-23T18:43:00.002-06:00

STBX was off for the weekend, so his son was here at the house.

I was SO HAPPY to see him! We talked for a bit about a game we both play, and I went to bed at about 10 because I had to get up early the next morning for school.

I woke up at about 6, got ready for school, and was going to tell STBX's son that there was milk and cereal and other stuff if he wanted breakfast. But he wasn't in his room. Noone was here at the house.

I didn't hear anyone leave the house this morning either.
So on my way to school I called STBX and asked where everybody was.

"We went to my parents' house late lastnight," he said.

"To spend the night?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Instead of staying here at the house?" I asked.

"Yeah. You want to have an argument about it?"

*sigh*

Before you ask, YES, he actually said that.
How old are we, twelve?
Just one more thing I will not miss.

My Life Now

2008-11-20T09:04:00.002-06:00

I saw this painting the other day and thought "Whoah...that's how I feel right now..."

Like there are a million paths spread out in front of me, and I just have to choose one and go.

You see that bird to the left? Is it a dead bird? A live bird?

Maybe it represents my soon-to-be-ex-husband and I should step on it as I walk past...

Wait no! I'm not vindictive like that...

Yes I am.

Things That I Miss

2008-11-18T09:13:00.003-06:00

There isn't much that I will miss here...the house was never mine, and obviously the man was never really mine either... I will not miss being marginalized whenever I tried to present an opinion, made to feel like I am just a minor annoyance on a path to something greater. I will not miss the lack of affection or the anger that I so often feared.

And of course it occurred to me the other day that as a stepparent, I have no recourse for the one thing that I WILL MISS. The kids.

Granted, they aren't really kids any more. The boy will be 18 in January (can you believe it!!! ) and his daughter will be 16 in March. I remember the first time I came over to this house, they were 10 and 12, and so shy. They have become such amazing people.

I will not miss being taken for granted--I was always just expected to take care of everything whenever my STBX was at work, etc. I didn't like feeling like I was a built-in babysitter for the times when he couldn't be here for the kids. But I loved their father, and I love them, so I took care of them, washed their clothes, tried to make sure they had enough to eat, and when their dad was in one of his moods, I would smile at them, so that they knew everything would be ok.

Now I wonder what will happen. I will try to keep in touch, but you know how things are. They have a loyalty to their dad (and rightly so), why would they want to keep in touch with me? I'm sure the whole situation makes them uncomfortable.

It makes me uncomfortable too. And sad. All the time.

I will miss those kids.

For Those of You Who Care

2008-11-16T15:36:00.002-06:00

I deleted my YouTube account.

The username was KatieGary04, and since Gary left Katie, and Katie doesn't particularly enjoy being reminded of Gary, I deleted the account. I will create a new account with a suitably Katie-centric username, and repost the videos there for your enjoyment. When I have done this, I will post the information here so that those of you who want to (Jen) can resubscribe.

Thank you for your support.

Someday

2008-11-16T14:12:00.000-06:00

more animals

WARNING: NSFW

2008-11-10T08:32:00.002-06:00

For those of you who don't know, NSFW=Not Safe For Work, and if you are easily offended, or if your wife is looking over your shoulder, unless she is a Katiefucious fan, you shouldn't click the link in this blog post.

Because it is a naked woman!!!

OMG!!NEKKID!!!!!!

I was piddling around on the net the other day and I came across a list of Mensa members. One of them was a Playboy playmate. So of course I HAD to look!

Here she is.

(Something I learned when googling Julie Peterson: you can pretty much find pictures of anything you want out there. Scary! )

One of the reasons Bridget was my favorite GND was that she had her Master's degree and was in school to get her PhD. Awesomeness.

Yes, boys, there are intelligent, pretty girls out there.

Unfortunately, we're not always smart enough to recognize the assholes right away. Sometimes it takes us a few years.

I Voted Yesterday

2008-11-05T13:36:00.002-06:00

I voted yesterday.

Those of you who know me well enough know who I voted for. I am a card-carrying Republican, and a staunch conservative. I am not ashamed of this, and if any readers who stumble upon this blog choose to disparage me or bash the Republican party in the comments, I will exercise my right to delete the comments, because it is, of course, MY blog, and I will do whatever the hell I want to with it.

I didn't vote for Barack Obama.

Although I, like many Republicans, am excited about the new possibilities for our country this morning. Even though my chosen candidate did not win, it is always thrilling to see Democracy in action, and electing our country's president is always an excellent example of the democratic system.

I am not quite sure what Obama has planned, nor am I sure I agree with all of his policies, but anyone who can get so many apathetic people behind him must have something good up his sleeve. If he continues this momentum, and energizes the politically- and socially-lazy peons of our American communities, then it will be a good thing. His plans for social reorganization and distribution of wealth frighten me a little. People spout the word "Socialism" often, and with good reason. Socialism is just one stop on the way to Communism, and THAT, my friends, is a scary thought. Look up some of the confiscatory tax rates of Socialist countries, and then look up their growth rate over the past few years.

Here's hoping that he will continue to strengthen the Capitalist society that has made this country a contender for so many years.

I worry about Obama.

I worry that some toothless bushwhacker will pull out his rifle one day and decide he needs to rid the country of the "ay-rab" who was just elected president.

(for those of you who don't know, Barack Obama is NOT an "Ay-rab")

I fear that he will not see the end of his Presidency.

I hope I am wrong.

I'm an Idiot

2008-11-04T12:55:00.002-06:00

So there's a tiny kitten on the front porch eating dry food soaked in water.

Our neighbor's cat has like nineteen litters of kittens every year, and this one followed me to the front door today, after Sumo messed with it for a while (no, not like he was going to eat it--like he was going to lick its butt and mother it and stuff). It was so pathetic and hungry...I felt so bad for it...

Why am I such an big softie? I don't know. I could tell the poor thing was quite literally STARVING--eyes bugged out, and when I touched it, all I felt was bones. I put the bowl down and the poor thing went to town like it had never eaten before...ever...

Might make a good outside cat. I shouldn't keep feeding it, though, since I'm not going to be living here much longer. Hm.

Crap.

You're just perpetuating the stereotype, dummy

2008-10-26T19:53:00.002-05:00

On my last trip home from Iowa, I decided to take Hwy 30 all the way across Illinois.

Big mistake.

BIG.

It was horrible. Driving through all those small towns, with their detours and slowpokes and signs that don't allow you enough time to change lanes so that you can continue on the same road...

Anyways, I got lost in Joliet. Since I was hungry at the time, I decided to stop at a Burger King for some food and directions.

I walked in the door and stood at the counter. The girl at the cash register just looked at me.

"Hi," I said.

Bad sign...

She said hi, and I proceeded to order a whopper (yes, I KNOW THEY'RE NOT GOOD FOR ME, but when you're on the road, sometimes you take what you can get) and ask her if she knew how to get back out to Hwy 30.

"No," she says, "but my manager does. I'll ask him."

So I got my drink, and waited at the counter. A couple more people came in and ordered meals, and after about two minutes had passed, she was handed a bag (which was obviously mine) and walked up to the counter and yelled "WHOPPER. WHO ORDERED THE WHOPPER."

I was standing RIGHT THERE, AND I HAD ORDERED IT LIKE 2.5 MINUTES BEFOREHAND.

So I said "I did."

She handed me the bag and I stood there and waited for her manager to come out, because she asked him for directions, right?

No.

She stood there and talked to the people in the back for like another three minutes. I got tired of waiting and went out to my car. I ate my WHOPPER (bleh) and tried to think of someone I could call for directions. I decided to find a gas station and maybe a nice trucker to ask for help, and I pulled out onto the road. About a block down, I saw a sign.

HWY 30

I had driven past it in my anxiousness at being lost!

But wait...

That idiot at Burger King works LESS THAN HALF A FREAKIN' MILE FROM IT AND SHE DIDN'T KNOW WHERE IT WAS.

OH MY GOD.

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD.

Talk about perpetuating a stereotype! Fast food workers are all morons? I'm sure they aren't (I've met some very sharp McDonald's employees in my life), but this girl wasn't doing much to buck the trend.

Dear Baby Jesus, please give that girl a brain for Christmas. She obviously needs one. Amen.

You Should Suffer As Much As I Am

2008-10-15T19:39:00.003-05:00

Cry
Faith Hill

If I had just one tear
Running down your cheek
Maybe I could cope
Maybe I'd get some sleep
If I had just one moment at your expense
Maybe all my misery
Would be well spent

Could you cry a little
Lie just a little
Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me

If your love could be caged, honey, I would hold the key
And conceal it underneath the pile of lies you handed me
And you'd hunt and those lies
They'd be all you'd ever find
And that'd be all you'd have to know
For me to be fine

And you'd cry a little
Die just a little
And baby I would feel just a little less pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me

Give it up baby
I hear you're doin' fine
Nothin's gonna save me
I see it in your eyes
Some kind of heartache
Honey, give it a try
I don't want pity
I just want what is mine

Could you cry a little
Lie just a little
Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain
I gave now I'm wanting
Something in return
So cry just a little for me

Cry just a little for me
Could you cry just a little for me?

Plagiarism is Bad

2008-10-10T08:15:00.002-05:00

I had my computers students do a small research paper on a computer security topic. Freshmen should know how to do research papers, no? I didn't ask for much. Three internet sources (RELIABLE SOURCES, no Wikipedia crap), and they only had to use parenthetical citations, which are the EASIEST kind!

At least I thought it was easy...the first paper handed in was copied/pasted directly from a website. Do they think I'm an idiot? Apparently.

I wrote the website address at the top of the kid's paper, handed it back to him with the word REDO at the top of the page.

Perhaps I expect too much? I didn't think a 2-3 page paper was that difficult of an assignment, but apparently it is.

And I TOLD them that Plagiarism is illegal! You can go to jail for it!!!

Two Algebra tests and then I'm gone for the weekend. THANK GOD.

Sad News

2008-10-09T08:54:00.003-05:00

My Girls Next Door are no more.

Seems like everybody's breaking up lately!

I am sorry to hear this, but the article mentions Bridget's spinoff show on the Travel Channel, which I will try to catch. I always liked Bridget. :)

Hereditary?

2008-10-03T16:54:00.002-05:00

Sometimes you wonder where people get their money-management skills...

And then you see how their parents handle money, and it becomes apparent.

I thank the Lord that my mother was a saver. Would that everyone's mother was the same!

I Try

2008-09-26T16:31:00.002-05:00

"I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains."

-- Anne Frank

I try. Oh, I try.

Wild Turkey

2008-09-23T14:27:00.002-05:00

No, not the liquor! The birds!

Yesterday when I came home from school, there was a flock of wild hens at the end of the road! It is always so good to see them--I have never lived anyplace where I had a flock of wild turkeys around!

One of the things that I will miss about this place is the wildlife. There are beautiful birds and squirrels and deer and wild turkeys...it really is very peaceful. There were MORE of those things when there wasn't a damn tree-trimming business across the road that proceeded to make loads of noise all day long, but most of the animals still come around when it's quiet.

In fact, the other day I heard some really loud noises in the woods--it sounded like someone was laughing hysterically--and I was informed that it was coyotes. I have never seen a coyote up close, and I am not scared of them. It was neat to hear them.

When we had the farm, my mom and I raised domestic turkeys. They were literally like feathered dogs. They always wanted to be around you, and they would follow you anywhere. If you stayed in one spot too long, they would settle in and start picking bugs or grass to eat.

Turkeys are excellent exterminators. They will eat most of the bugs in a field, which made them excellent companions when we were fixing fences, etc.

I really miss having a flock of turkeys!

Ology

2008-09-19T09:50:00.002-05:00

Karianne posted this. I thought it was neato.

Katieology

Let others know a little more about yourself, re-post this as your name followed by "ology"

**FOODOLOGY**
What is your salad dressing of choice?
Cesar. Only Cesar.
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
That's a tough one. Anywhere with a good steak. Kelsey's.
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
Mom's Vietnamese Spring Rolls
What are your pizza toppings of choice?
Mushrooms, green peppers, onions, ham, and pepperoni
What do you like to put on your toast?
Butter, eggs, oatmeal, basically butter followed by any breakfast food.

**TECHNOLOGY**
What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A photo of Sumo and Pearl
How many televisions are in your house?
Four! We should get rid of some.
What color cell phone do you have?
A dirty maroon color, and black.

**BIOLOGY**
Are you right-handed or left-handed?
Very right-handed
Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
By a doctor? No. I did lose some baby teeth when I was a kid though
What is the last heavy item you lifted?
A box of books.
Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
No

**BULLCRAPOLOGY**
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
No
If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
Mary Burdt. That was my Grandmother's name.
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
Sure.

**DUMOLOGY**
How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
Probably about five.
Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
Well, my husband is a cop, so every day I have a run-in with a cop
What did you want to be when you grew up?
Farmer. Still want to.
Last person you talked to?
One of my students
Last person you hugged?
My mom.

**FAVORITOLOGY**
Season?
Fall
Holiday?
Christmas!
Day of the week?
Thursday

**CURRENTOLOGY**
Missing someone?
Hmm yes, but not by choice.
Mood?
Melancholy, but I am trying to be happy despite it.
Listening to?
Students taking an Algebra test.
Watching?
Students taking an Algebra test.
Worrying about?
Students taking an Algebra test!

**RANDOMOLOGY**
First place you went this morning?
Work/School
What can you not wait to do?
Go visit a friend on New Year's Eve.
What's the last movie you saw?
In the theatre: Hellboy II
At home: As You Like It
Do you smile often?
When I have something to smile about.

I don't usually do this, but...

2008-09-13T18:01:00.002-05:00

I happen to love Jo Dee Messina. I know, I know, she's a country singer, and I'm supposed to be a Yankee and do my civic duty and hate country music, but those 3 years I lived in Nashville made their mark. I happen to love all music, country music included.

I think it's lame when people post song lyrics. I'm lame today. Watch the video instead. It's at the end of the post.

Tomorrow's Another Day

(Jo Dee Messina with Tim McGraw)
(Billy Montana/Helen Darling)

Another day has almost come and gone
Can't imagine what else could go wrong
Sometimes I'd like to hide away somewhere and lock the door
A single battle lost but not the war.

Cause, Tomorrow's another day
And I'm thirsty anyway
So bring on the rain

It's almost like the hard times circle 'round
A couple drops and they all start coming down
Yeah, I might feel defeated, I might hang my head
I might be barely breathing - but I'm not dead, no

Cause Tomorrow's another day
And I'm thirsty anyway
So bring on the rain

I'm not gonna let it get me down
I'm not gonna cry
And I'm not gonna lose any sleep tonight

Cause Tomorrow's another day
And I am not afraid
So bring on the rain

Rainbow Conspiracies!! Run away!!!!

2008-09-13T16:10:00.001-05:00

I LOL'd

Tomorrow, the Test

2008-09-12T20:56:00.002-05:00

The Praxis II Mathematics Content Knowledge Test.

If I don't pass it, I don't student teach. It's not a huge deal, since I already have a teaching job, but it will mean that my teaching license is postponed.

I am not worried about it, though.

Katiefucious SMRT!

One of the gals in my TTT class was so worried about her English test, I thought she was going to vomit in my car (we carpool to class). I kept telling her that she would be JUST FINE. She is smart as well. Everyone in my class is smart. There are 8 of us, all from different backgrounds, etc.

The woman I carpool with is in the same boat as I am. Got her degree, tired of making ten bucks an hour, wanted to do something more with her life!

Gotta get some rest. Up early for the two-hour test of my math content knowledge tomorrow morning. Wish me luck!!

Here is Where I am Today

2008-09-07T08:33:00.003-05:00

And probably will be for a long time.

Thanks to everyone for your support.
Especially when I did not deserve it.

My Life in Cartoon Form

2008-08-27T18:01:00.003-05:00

Typical

2008-08-08T08:31:00.000-05:00

more cat pictures

Math

2008-08-06T16:59:00.002-05:00

Dancing with the Universe

2008-07-29T12:19:00.003-05:00

This is amazing. I watch it every single day. Sometimes multiple times a day.

Here is the Chicago Trib article about it.

From this article, where they translated the words of Rabindranath Tagore's poem into English:

Stream of Life
by Rabindranath Tagore

The same stream of life that runs through my veins night and day
runs through the world and dances in rhythmic measures.

It is the same life that shoots in joy through the dust of the earth
in numberless blades of grass
and breaks into tumultuous waves of leaves and flowers.

It is the same life that is rocked in the ocean-cradle of birth
and of death, in ebb and in flow.

I feel my limbs are made glorious by the touch of this world of life.
And my pride is from the life-throb of ages dancing in my blood this moment.

Ha!

2008-07-27T08:49:00.000-05:00

more cat pictures

I Heart Math

2008-07-21T15:13:00.001-05:00

How do you tell if a mathematician is an extrovert?

She looks at your shoes when you talk to her.

One Month Has Passed

2008-07-14T22:15:00.003-05:00

One month since our precious girl left us. There is still an empty space here where our gentle girl still lives in our hearts.

Our Sumo is lonely, so we decided to look for a friend for him. We had originally considered a puppy, because they are usually the easiest to integrate into a family, and so we made some phone calls, visited some friends, etc.

We adopted Sumo from the local Humane Society, so we went there to see if there were any female dogs that might do well with Sumo. As we were sitting in the car outside of the building, my DH's phone rang...

It was his commander notifying him that his unit has been mobilized to go to Afghanistan in 2009.

Fantastic.

So a puppy is out of the question. I will not have time to take care of our household and potty train, clean up, and otherwise care for a very young, energetic dog.

But our Sumo still needs a buddy. What could we possibly do that is less labor-intensive than a puppy...hmm...

Hmmmm......

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Meet Fafnir (back) and Fenris (front). Four months old and full of piss and vinegar.

Adorable....little.....monsters.....

...and they love Sumo. :)

Ode to my Pearl

2008-06-13T12:42:00.005-05:00

Wonderful, wonderful two years.
Thank you, my girl, for being our friend.
See you at the Rainbow Bridge.

EFF THAT "EFC" SHYTE

2008-06-12T16:38:00.005-05:00

Yeah, you heard me.

I filled out my renewal FAFSA this year, so that I can start my licensure classes in August, and I was doing some research on Pell Grants. I was curious to see why I didn't get one, so I did some checking, and apparently you are only eligible for a Pell Grant if your EFC (Estimated Financial Contribution) is less than like $5000.

Seriously, though. You've got to ask yourself why they're expecting you to contribute if you've filled out a FAFSA. Obviously you can't afford to pay for school yourself...

So I looked mine up, just to see what it was, and it was almost THIRTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. They expect me to contribute $13,000 out of my pocket to my schooling.

People, people, people. If I could contribute thirteen thousand dollars to my own education, I wouldn't be filling out the damn FAFSA to begin with!!

They don't ask you how much you're making NOW, or what your NET income is, after you've paid your income tax, property tax, sales tax, tax tax, Social Security, Medicare, and don't even get me started on all of the other crap reasons that money is deducted from our monthly paycheck.

Thirteen thousand dollars is a lot of money. I can think of a million things that we could do with an extra thirteen thousand dollars every year. Fix up the house, install central air, or even take the kids shopping more often.

ONE YEAR PEOPLE. ONE MORE YEAR OF SCHOOL AND THEN I'M IN MY TEACHING JOB.

So I will just continue to look for other vehicles to pay off my student loans--I'm sure there are some out there.

Random Note: on the SciFi channel, they've been playing an Incredible Hulk marathon all week. You remember the 70's series with Bill Bixby right? I have good memories of that show. When my Grandparents used to babysit me, I'd get my hamburger with pickles and ketchup, my shot of coke (Grampa called it a "shot"--it was in a small glass--I didn't know what a shot was until I was older) and watch the Incredible Hulk and the Planet of the Apes series every single day. EVERY SINGLE DAY. Good times. :)

Check This Out

2008-06-09T21:03:00.004-05:00

Special thanks to Cathy Thorne who has given me permission to post copies of her comics on my blog (I feel uber special!!! When I emailed her via the "contact me" link on her webpage, I didn't expect her to say yes! ). Karianne initially sent me to the page, and once I started looking, I was totally hooked!

Her comics are refreshingly simple, and very funny!

If you don't agree with me, I don't want to hear it

2008-06-07T22:51:00.004-05:00

I read Wil Wheaton's blog quite often. I think it is very good! I don't agree with him on everything (for example, I wouldn't vote for Barack Obama if you paid me a bajillion dollars because I don't want to end up living in a socialist country where the government makes my decisions for me), but I find his posts interesting, funny, and insightful.

I try not to think of him as Wesley Crusher. He's got a goatee and a wife and kids and stuff.

Anyways, he posted a link to a book called Little Brother. I looked through the reviews on amazon.com, and most of them were good. There were a couple of negative ones that scared me a little bit, and I checked the comments on one of the reviews. (it seems like you can comment on commenting now, and comment on the comments to the comments...)

One of the comments to one of the one-star reviews is hidden, though, as you can see. Apparently if enough people disagree with what you say, they can get amazon to hide your comment to the review and noone can see it unless they click on the "Show post anyway" link.

Of course, I clicked it, because I thought, wow it must be pretty bad if it's hidden, right? Profanity or child pr0n or something right?

Nope, it was just a guy who agreed with the one-star review.

So the comment by the guy who agreed with the review is panned, but all the people who disagreed with the negative review are encouraged, including the one who wrote "In the future, I suggest this person maybe stick to his right wing nut radio stations." How does THAT add to the discussion, I ask you?

You can't even express your opinion nowadays without being labeled for your political preference, and even then, there are so many sheeple out there that if one person says something bad about someone else, the other brainless, witless followers will just go right along with it. Anyone know who runs the news stations? I'll give you a hint: it's not a bunch of saints with no political affiliation. It's people who have opinions, and therefore can never be truly objective.

I am not simply referring to one political group either. Left-wing and right-wing have become terms of disparagement and disdain, and are now used as cheap insults.

Guess what. Everyone has opinions. Whether or not I agree with them does NOT make them any less valid. I will NOT call someone an idiot, or disparage them simply because they hold a different political affiliation than I do.

For me to call you an idiot, you'd have to do something a lot worse than disagree with my political views.

You'd have to...like...pull out in front of me or something...or insult my family...or interchange the words "their," "they're," and "there" because you don't know which one to use because you're an idiot.

Research, people! Research! Don't just watch the news!!! Read books, learn new things, do some investigating of your own! No television news station is purely objective!! They all have their own agenda, their own views. MAKE UP YOUR OWN MIND! Political candidates have very public records, including their affiliations and decisions. You CAN know the truth! And if you don't agree with someone, don't try to squash their ability to speak. Let them speak. Most of the time, the idiots will prove their idiocy by opening their mouths anyways.

Template Handicapped

2008-06-07T20:52:00.005-05:00

Why yes, this is a new template.

And yes, I had to actually edit the html myself. Seriously. I had to like type html code type stuff and I was so proud of myself for actually remembering some of the code.

I went through a few templates. Some of them looked weird with the blogger layout (I couldn't have fixed that code if you paid me a bajillion dollars. Ok, maybe for a bajillion dollars) and some of them had weird vertical breaks in the page (again, something I do not know how to fix), so I experimented a bit and this was the one that fit the best.

In the original template, there were links to sexy lingerie and stuff that I had to delete from the code text. I wouldn't want my mom to find this blog some day (yeah, like that'll happen) and be all horrified that I linked to lingerie even though it wasn't really me who linked to it because it was whoever wrote the original code for this template...

Anyways, I think it looks cute, and I was so freakin' tired of the stupid old lame standard blogspot templates. It's nice of blogspot to provide them to us free of charge, but Jesus told me that he's bored with my old template and he would like to see something new on my blog. You wouldn't want me to disappoint Jesus, would you??

Me Solving Social Problems...Kinda

2008-05-28T21:35:00.000-05:00

I do a lot of thinking in the shower.

I was thinking about a relative of mine who I spoke to recently, and how she's living in an apartment that is paid for by the father of her third child. Her first child lives with her dad at the moment, and her second child doesn't see his father much. Three different kids, three different daddies. Most recent kids' daddy is married. To someone other than my relative.

It's a Jerry Springer show.

Anyways, she was on welfare for a while, but she hated it, so she got off, went to school, got a job, etc. She was doing fine for a while, making it on her own. Now she's sponging off this married guy that knocked her up...is it better than welfare? Meh...morally, no, but at least the taxpayers aren't paying for it any more.

So I was like "Dude! Welfare sucks! These people are havin' babies just so that they can get another check? What if they put a limit on the amount of time people could collect welfare at one time, like only for six months at a time, and then put a lifetime limit of like five years?"

And then I was like "Dude! I'm totally awesome! I should blog the awesomeness!"

Then I did some research and found out that the Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Act is in existence.

So my work is done. Maybe I will try to think of some other social problems to think about, and find solutions to that have already been found...heh. :)

For those of you who are too proud to be on welfare, good for you.
For those of you who are content to ride on the backs of others, surviving off the sweat of their brow, I got nothin' for you.

Funniest Loldog Ever

2008-05-28T12:02:00.000-05:00

see more dog pictures

I laughed so hard at this, I thought I was gonna pee my pants.

OMG U SLOW I HAET U

2008-05-23T11:35:00.000-05:00

Does the fact that it's Friday have some unspoken significance to drivers?

I mean, I always thought Sunday was the slow day...the day where all the senior citizens pull the Lincoln Continentals and Pontiac Parisiennes out of the garage and go tooling around the back roads to look at the scenery.

This morning I was behind several people who seem to have forgotten where their gas pedal is. I have included herein a handy-dandy diagram for them. Please feel free to print out a few copies, and if you see any of these forgetful drivers, just plaster a diagram onto their windshield while you are sitting behind them, waiting for them to accelerate at a green light.

These people are also the ones who slow down when the highway switches from a divided 4-lane into a 2-lane...I hate that...

End of Rant. Have a nice day! (and speed up, dammit!!!)

Carwash Photoblog, Revisited

2008-05-21T09:20:00.000-05:00

Weeelllllll.....I've got a long-ass photo blog for you today.

About a car wash.

Excitement!!!

It started out as my feeble attempt to amuse myself by taking a photo of the mist rainbow caused by the car wash that I was waiting in line for. The car in front of me went in, and the doors didn't close, so I got a good view of what was going on. And lots of rainbows, which was cool. I like rainbows.

See? Pretty pretty rainbows!!

I was only getting a car wash because by buying a wash, I get ten cents off per gallon of gas!! Instantly!
What a deal!!!!

And because I love the Honda. :)

Yes, those are stickers around the logo in the steering wheel. I think it makes the car look more festive! Don't you?

So I waited for the car in front of me to be finished, and when that car started pulling out, I pulled in a bit.

But the car stopped under the dryer. See? See the brake lights??

So I waited...

And waited...

Aaugh!

FINALLY little miss slow-pants in her Ford got out of the freakin' way and I pulled in to get my well-deserved washing.

First they spray your car with some fabulous-looking soap. Pink and blue! I can't think of two better colors for soap. And together, they make a nice purple foam.

Then the spinny washy things come across the sides of the car

Then the spinny washy things go up and over the top of the car

Notice there is NO car in front of me.

Then the spinny washy things go back along the side of the car again

And up and over...
I'm not really sure why they go twice, but it made me feel really clean, both outside and in.

Then you get a nice clean rinse, and if you've picked the super mega ultra car wash, or whatever it's called, you get a wax-type stuff sprayed on your car that is supposed to protect it from dirt and gooky stuff, and an undercarriage wash.

I don't know about you, but I like a good undercarriage-scrub.

Here is my super ultra mega waxy car spray runneling off.

Annnnnd....we're done.

So the dryer pops back out (for me, this time), and I notice that upon it is written three words.

Here is a closer photo for your perusal.

I've highlighted the important word here.

Obviously miss Ford couldn't read what the dryer said, or else she would have DRIVEN through the door, underneath the dryer, instead of STOPPING under it.

I don't read anything on that sign about stopping...

So finally I get through the dryer (very quickly, mind you, because I don't need no stinkin' dryer to dry my car! The wind and the sun do that for me. There wasn't anyone behind me, so I COULD have taken my time, but I didn't. It was the principal of the thing.), and pull out of the parking lot.

And out to the stoplight that leads to work...
And who do I see at the stoplight??? Miss slow-pants in her Ford, itching to annoy some other unsuspecting car wash attendee!

She probably took so long to get here because there were so many OTHER people around to annoy. She couldn't just stop with me...she had places to go, people to stop in front of!!

She'll get hers...

So the Honda is now clean, and sparkly!

So piddy! :)

Hear That?

2008-05-20T09:44:00.000-05:00

It's the world's skinniest violin...

Got this from fark.com, a website that I don't recommend unless you have a very thick skin and a good sense of humor.

Models feel Lonely, Unhappy

"MODELS feel like clothes horses stripped of their autonomy and happiness by a lonely life strutting the catwalk, new research has revealed."

Please, please don't misunderstand me...I would like to drop quite a few pounds...but...I mean...COME ON!!!

I...I...I can't even think of where to start up with the ludicrous responses to an article like that...or even, to be honest, the ridiculously hysterical responses to the freakin' models who say shit like this!!

I could understand it if the models felt unhappy because they were presenting a completely unattainable body image that the rest of the females in the world will never resemble, and maybe they had some guilty feelings about that, but comeon!!!! Clothes horses??? Stripped of their autonomy????

Who the hell are these people?

Model: Hmm...what should I do today? Buy a Ferrari for my chauffeur to drive me around in?

Me: Hmm...what should I do today? Oh yeah, that's right, drive my Honda to work, work for eight hours, drive myself home from work, cook dinner, clean up after dinner, do the laundry, pay the bills, clean the house, feed the dogs, shovel the sidewalk, clean the toilets (what model has ever touched a toilet, I wonder, other than to hold her head up while she pukes into it?), make sure the kids have what they need for school tomorrow before they go to bed, water the plants, vaccuum the house, put the clean dishes away, make lunch for tomorrow, oh, and if I am not dead asleep after all this, maybe I can surf the web and blog a bit, or check my email.

And August, I'll be starting school to get my teaching license.

So please pardon me if I don't immediately feel sorry for these twiggy human beings.

Have you ever watched "America's Top Model?" All they do all day is sit around and complain and collapse from dehydration (it happens EVERY SINGLE SEASON). When the producers put a rack of clothes out, they don't even have to wonder what size the girls are, because SKELETONS ONLY COME IN ONE SIZE.

Although I wouldn't define Tyra Banks as a skeleton. She thick. Mmm....

What do you Feed?

2008-05-19T09:33:00.000-05:00

The true horrors of pet food revealed: Prepare to be shocked by what goes into dog food and cat food

What kind of food do you feed your cat/dog?

How much do you know about recent pet food recalls?

I hate to sound like a commercial, but we have found over the years that if we buy a higher-quality dog/cat food, which usually denotes a higher price, the animal eats less of it, and is healthier. This means that where we would spend x dollars every month on Brand X dog food, and the dog must eat 6 cups per day to get daily nutrient requirements, where he would only have to eat 4 cups per day of the higher quality dog food.

Lower quality dog food generally means more fillers (wheat gluten is just one example), meaning less nutritive ingredients, meaning the dog has to eat more to get what he needs. Higher quality dog food should have little to NO fillers, meaning the dog does not need to eat quite as much to get the protein/vitamins/minerals that he needs to function on a daily basis.

So basically even though we pay more for the high quality stuff, the dog eats less, and therefore it balances out.

We use Canidae.

Highly recommended by myself, and not too expensive. We get it for about $35 per 40-lb bag.

DRIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-05-18T21:49:00.000-05:00

Yeah, you heard me. DRIVE, BASTARDS. DRIIIIIVE.

Some days, I spend most of my drive-time yelling that word at the top of my lungs.

Here are some of the things that cause me excruciating mental anguish while driving:

1.) People who drive ten (twenty, thirty...) miles per hour under the posted speed limit.
It's a HIGHWAY, folks. If you can't stand the heat, get your arse off the dang highway!!!!!1!!!!!

2.) People who cannot judge distance/speed and pull out in front of me, causing me to slow down dramatically to avoid rear-ending them.
Is your wife in labor in the back seat? If she's not, then DON'T PULL OUT IN FRONT OF ME!!!! Wait the five friggin' seconds for my car to pass, and then pull out. It's not rocket science. (and I know rocket science)

3.) People who drive while talking on their cell phone and/or reading a map, drinking coffee, putting on lipstick, slapping children in the back seat, etc.
There was a guy behind me the other day who was singing and waving his hands around while reading a newspaper and drinking a can of soda. I was terrified that he was going to rear-end me...which brings me to my next point...

4.) People who tailgate.
I swear to all that is holy if you get any closer, I'm going to slam on my brakes...hope you've got good insurance, asshole...

5.) People who vary their speeds on a straight or slightly curvy road.
PICK A SPEED, PEOPLE!!!! If you've got cruise control, USE IT!!!

6.) People who don't pay attention to semis.
They're bigger than you, they need more space to maneuver, and if they run over you, you'll die. Isn't that enough reason to be careful around them?

7.) People who drive slowly in the left hand lane.
It's a passing lane. If I have to pass you on the right, rest assured that I WILL pull back in front of you and slow down until you move over.

8.) People who drive while they are drunk.
Self-explanatory. These people should be run over with thier own cars.

I understand that people make mistakes while they are driving, but a mistake can easily turn into an accident, or a death. When you are driving that 3-ton SUV around town, you had BETTER be focused on what you're doing, because I sure will be...

Don't get me wrong, I do NOT get road-rage, I'm just an aggressive driver who PAYS ATTENTION to what I'm doing. CLOSE attention! I have never gotten in any kind of accident because I was angry while driving. Now if you happen to catch yourself going 45 in a 55 and you look in your rearview mirror to find someone screaming at you, you might want to rethink your driving habits....

It's common courtesy. If you drive like a moron, people will hate you. Women will scream at you, men will flip you off, grannies will honk at you, and children will cry at the mention of your name.

Now get out there, put your hands at two and ten, and for God's sake drive like a normal human being.

Random YouTube Goofiness

2008-05-17T09:45:00.000-05:00

Some funny stuff :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHzdsFiBbFc

And a video that I just think is cool.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4&mode

Turn Lanes are Useful

2008-05-15T09:24:00.000-05:00

I swear to God, people, I am going to rear-end you ON PURPOSE one of these days...

If there is a turn lane that you can use to get out of the way of other cars when you make your right or left hand turn, USE IT! Don't just slightly move over so that noone can use the lane you just vacated.

Pick a damn lane.

(and not just because it's a right-hand turn!)

I most often see older people doing this. Is it because they're so short that they can't see where the lane lines are?

Drive like normal people, for crying out loud.

LEFT LANE IS FOR FAST PPLS

2008-05-13T22:00:00.000-05:00

If you are reading this, and are from Michigan, I would like to show you a diagram I whipped up.

If you are in the left lane, and people are passing you on the right, you are in the WRONG FREAKING LANE. If you are in the left lane, and people are passing you on the right, you need to move your slow ass OVER.

And why does it always seem to be people from Michigan who do this? You never see Illinois license plates in the left hand lane, being passed by fifty angry drivers. Illinois people drive like freakin' maniacs I LOVE THEM!

And that concludes my driving rant for the day.

BEST BOOK EVER

2008-05-11T23:37:00.000-05:00

I love to read. I have always loved to read. I usually stick with the science fiction/fantasy genre, and have been a fan of Anne McCaffrey for years. My first of these books was a story by Robin McKinley called The Hero and the Crown about a girl named Aerin who becomes queen of Damar. It's a very good book--one of my very favorites!

But, to be honest, I very rarely devour a book so singlemindedly as I did this one:

The Black Jewels Trilogy, by Anne Bishop. Daughter of the Blood, Heir to the Shadows, Queen of the Darkness.

There is hate, sex, violence, rape, blood, gore, death, knives, swords, child abuse, debauchery, lust, intrigue, vicious animals, and all sorts of vile things that I wouldn't recommend for the faint of heart. But the story is so gripping, so well-written, full of hope, love, and wonder...well, to say I couldn't put it down is a bit of an understatement...

And of course, the supplement, Dreams Made Flesh. :)

I finished this in about three hours. It is not a small book.

If you ever get the chance to read either of these books, put all of your pretention aside, because they are not your momma's unicorn stories (although there are unicorns).

And if you know me personally, and would like to read them, I would be happy to lend them to you, with a signed contract that you will return them when you are finished. (Yeah, they are that good)

Just kidding about the contract.

Maybe.

:)

Update: There are two additional supplements to the original trilogy. One is called The Invisible Ring and the other, which I JUST FINISHED OMG SO GOOD is called Tangled Webs. And if you check her official website, you'll see that she has ANOTHER BLACK JEWELS BOOK COMING OUT IN MARCH 2009 OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!

As soon as amazon.com has The Shadow Queen available for pre-order, I'm so pre-ordering it...

Anne Bishop, please keep writing. Please please please please...please.

She has other series, such as the House of Gaian series, and the Ephemera novels, but none of them have quite the kick of the Black Jewels books. Sebastian and Belladonna come close, but they just don't capture me like Daemon and Angelline and Lucivar and Uncle Saetan.

I often find myself wanting to buy multiple copies of the same book just to have them.

Am I going all serial killers own multiple copies of Catcher in the Rye crazy?

Meh. I'm not that interesting. I just like to own books. DH and I have already decided that in the house we build, there will be a room in the house dedicated to the storage, display, and aquisition of books. A library, if you will. We have many many books, most of which are being stored in the attic in boxes, and they all want to be on a shelf somewhere where I can pick them up and read them whenever I want.

And of course we will have to make sure there is enough room for the books that we have yet to buy. :)

Random Notes

2008-05-07T09:37:00.001-05:00

Calculus Grade: A

Sweet.

Voted in the Primary: Check

Republican ftw

Speaking of that, take a look at this webpage. I found it this morning while researching an email that I received, and I found it quite interesting. Al Gore offsets his carbon footprint, while George W Bush doesn't make one.

http://snopes.com/politics/bush/house.asp

Obtained Gainful Employment: Pending

I am still working on a type of "writing assignment" that I was given as an...employment interview maybe? Not sure. Wish me luck. :)

Driving iz gud. Ppl R Stoopid.

2008-05-03T09:01:00.000-05:00

A diagram, for you, of one of my biggest driving pet peeves, EVAH.

YOU BLOCK MY VIEW, YOU GET A FROWNY FACE

If I am sitting at an intersection, waiting to turn left, with my blinker on, PATIENTLY waiting for traffic to clear so that I can GO, and some dumbass in his/her [insert name of massive SUV here] pulls up next to me, turning right, and completely blocks my view, I vote that I should be allowed to take out a fire extinguisher and spray him/her in the face with it.

I cannot count on all my fingers and toes how many times this has happened to me. The person who pulls up next to me can't see either, so why the hell are they pulling up? (They usually try to look through my window, which I attempt to block as much as possible) I drive a medium-sized SUV, and even I can't see past some of these idiots.

Anyways, my point is that it is courteous, and makes it a lot easier on me if I see someone already waiting at an intersection, to pull up slightly behind them, so that they can still see, plus I can see too!

It makes sense, people. Courteous driving helps us all, and keeps my blood pressure down.

Next up: a diagram on driving around semis.

Tutoring

2008-04-18T11:11:00.000-05:00

I have noticed a trend in tutoring.

This is not to stereotype people who seek help. But with some of the students that I tutor, it almost seems like they are only there so that you can do their homework for them.

If I am tutoring someone, and I get the feeling that they are just using me to get their homework done, I get really angry and it makes me less able to do my job effectively.

Basically I am there for the student. I am there to tutor because I WANT to be, not because I have to be. If you abuse my goodwill like that, I am going to ignore you and make you figure it out yourself. Because by God, you CAN figure it out yourself. You might have to work at it, and actually READ your chapter, but you'll figure it out.

So for those students who ask me a question and then go do their own thing, good for you. For those of you who are too lazy to do your homework by yourself, shame on you.

Calculus for Smarties...and Monies!

2008-04-07T16:24:00.000-05:00

Because we all know that Calculus isn't for dummies!

I tutor at the learning center here at school, as most of you already know. I invited my Calculus prof up to the learning center to work on some problems with us (me and another tutor). There were several problems on the last practice test that I just skipped because the answers weren't immediately obvious, and I wanted to know how they were done. I wasn't sure he'd actually show up ('cause, you know, he has a life outside of school) but today he did!

So we worked on some differential equations, some initial value problems, and in the midst of this, he remarked that his roommate in college had a job where he would just do differential equations. FOR A LIVING. Like companies sent him information, and he would do the math, then send them back the solved equation.

OH MY GOD.

I didn't even know there were jobs like that! Where you can do MATH ALL DAY!!!!! OMG!!!!!1111!!!1!11!11111!!!!!SUPER-ELEVENTY!!!

Rocket Science FTW!!!

I must find out how to get a job like this. I must.

MATH ALL DAY! CAN THERE BE ANYTHING BETTER?????!!!!!1!11!!!!!???///

Well....besides Gerard Butler's abs covered in chocolate all day...
...but I think that's a given.

So Good It Had to be Revised, and Relived

2008-04-05T15:44:00.000-05:00

If you are ever in my car, while I am driving...

These are the things you will most likely hear:

(all in caps because I very rarely "speak" any of them)

1.) OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO FREAKIN' REAR END YOU

2.) DUMBASS

3.) GET OFF YOUR DANG PHONE

4.) DRIIIIIIIVE

5.) FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

6.) YOU ARE AN IDIOT

7.) GO

8.) DON'T DO IT

9.) THE SPEED LIMIT IS [insert speed limit of given road]

10.) GOOD LORD

11.) TURN SIGNAL

None of these are directed at the passenger, mind you, but at offending members of the driving community.

Please people, I beg you, if you do not know how to drive, please stay off the road!

If you are scared of driving, please stay off the road.

If you are scared of driving fast, please stay off the road.

If you are scared of changing lanes, please stay off the road.

If you do not know how a 4-way stop works, please stay off the road.

If you can't figure out that the little green arrow in front of you means TURN THE DAMN CORNER, please stay off the road.

If you think that stop lights are a good place to apply mascara, please stay off the road.

If you are blind, please stay off the road.

If you are incompetent, please stay off the road.

If you are incontinent, please stay off the road.

If you are prone to amnesiatic moments where you forget where the gas pedal is, please stay off the road.

If you are an idiot, please stay off the road.

There are so many basic things that make life easier for the rest of us. Such as going the speed limit, knowing where the hell you're going, knowing where your dang turn signal is, knowing that when a semi turns in the middle of an intersection, it's pretty much going to take up the whole damn intersection so DON'T PULL YOUR CRAPPY LITTLE BMW UP SO FAR THAT THE SEMI HAS TO SIT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD UNTIL YOU GET A CLUE IN YOUR MORONIC BRAIN AND BACK YOUR DUMB ASS UP.

GAH!!!

The Garden in Katiefucious' Neighborhood

2008-04-03T21:38:00.000-05:00

Thank you Maple!

Here are a few selections from my "flower garden." Enjoy. :)

All are in Polar Coordinates, which are VERY interesting to work with. Requires a "brain shift" to remind yourself that you're working with (r, theta) instead of (x,y). Fun stuff!

And my own personal creation from today's class. I call it "Chrysanthemath."

Maple code: >polarplot( theta+ 8*cos(2*Pi*theta) - 2*cos(8*Pi*theta), theta = 0..25*Pi,color = pink, thickness = 4 );

So until later in the season, when I can take some photos of "real" flowers, I'll just have to make do with these!

Infinite Sequences and Series

2008-03-31T21:48:00.000-05:00

As we round out the semester, the topics in the Calculus textbook build upon each other, so if you don't understand something, it's a good time to make sure you get a hold of it before you start on the next chapter.

Sequences sound easy...but in reality the concepts are very abstract. You've got to imagine what might happen as some number n approaches infinity......

Very thought-provoking.

We're also studying polar coordinates. Specifically today, we studied Cardioid graphs. Did you know that polar coordinates are used to graph the space around certain types of microphones? Think Mandelbrot.

Or if you're interested in learning more about Infinite Sequences, think Nicole Oresme, and the harmonic series.

The harmonic series is related to musical sequences...which is related to cardioid microphones...see how it all relates?? See??? MATH IS EVERYWHERE, PEOPLE!!!1

On a related note (ha! get it? note? music? related? haha!), I can definitely tell who the older members of the class are...the guy who sat next to me today slept most of the time (why come to class?), and when he wasn't sleeping, he was sniffling grossly...and it was not harmonic...

Tell me, people, is it that embarrassing to blow your nose in front of someone?

I remember being self-conscious about it in high school...but we're in COLLEGE now. Aren't we supposed to be more mature? Nobody cares if you honk in class. I'd rather you honked a few times than snort disgustingly for an hour...

Ugh. It makes me want to vomit just thinking about it.

This same kid is in my group, and when we meet to work on group projects, he just sits there and plays internet poker while me and the other member of our group do the homework or the group project. It's extremely irritating. I'm thinking of saying something to the professor. I don't usually complain, but it's GROUP work......and it's annoying to give someone credit when they contributed nothing.

What would YOU do?

Relief

2008-03-28T22:56:00.000-05:00

Over spring break I went to visit my relatives in Iowa. It was a really good time, and I enjoyed it, even stayed a couple of extra days to help my aunt with some stuff related to my grandparents' estate.

The Friday of the week we returned from spring break, I had a Calculus test.

I studied a bit for it...unfortunately this semester has been very erratic. Lots of things going on, and my mind has not been on Math.

So when I took the test, I did not have high hopes for my grade. I wasn't "feelin' it" that morning. I expected to have to bring it back up by the end of the semester...

You can imagine my relief when we received our tests back yesterday and I discovered that I did NOT do as badly as I had feared! It was a good feeling.

---
We are in our last few weeks of this course, and from now to the end of the semester I fully expect to enjoy myself! Our newest hurdle?

The Eccentricity of Conic Sections and Applications

oh the applications...FREAKIN' AWESOME! you have no idea how fascinating it is! Did you know that the eccentricity of the earth's orbit is so low that its foci are actually located within the sun?? It's so interesting!!!! Thank you, Johannes Kepler! You so smrt! Me likey!

Science gud.

I am going to unplug the damn phone

2008-03-19T17:53:00.000-05:00

I just got off the phone with the fifth person at our mortgage company.

I say "the fifth person" because I called, spoke to one person in customer service (1) who transferred me to collections (2) (I wanted to ask about refinancing, but I don't think the (foreign-sounding) gentleman understood what I was asking), who then transferred me back to customer service (3) after they figured out what I wanted, customer service transferred me to someone in the department responsible for refinancing (4), and while on the phone with that person, who I thought was the person who I needed to talk to, that person transferred me to YET ANOTHER PERSON (FIVE!!!) right in the middle of our call.

I had to give out my account number FIVE FREAKIN' TIMES.

Why is this? Why can't just ONE person help me with the thing that I called about?

FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.

And we keep getting phone calls from something called "800 service." I can't tell if it's a telemarketer or a bill collector (could be either--I just don't answer the phone) but isn't there a limit on the amount of times they can call in one day? Good Lord.

I am going to start answering the phone, and if it's a telemarketer, I'm reporting them to the FCC or Attorney General or whoever you report these things to (I'm too lazy to look).

If it's a bill collector, I'll just calmly remind them that for years I paid on time, and if I'm not paying on time now, it's probably because I can't, not because I don't want to.

Jerks.

OMG NASA

2008-03-17T09:38:00.000-05:00

Did you know that there is a TV channel where you can watch real-time NASA stuff?

This morning I was perusing the Dish Network guide here at my aunt's, and saw this channel called NASA. I was like "Sweet!" and when I flipped to it, there was an interview going on between someone (I wasn't sure who) and the astronauts on the space shuttle Endeavour (which launched less than a week ago!!). I was watching the astronauts answer questions that the person posed. Who knew astronauts had such great senses of humor?

Then they showed some of the astronauts working on various bits throughout the International Space Station, and mentioned that there is a Japanese fellow working there. I read that Wikipedia.org article, and it mentions the nations involved in building the shuttle (which is awesome in and of itself) and that the ISS is the most expensive object ever built by man. Whoah!

Well I just wanted to let you all know that in case you ever wanted to watch. It really is fascinating.

It's my new favorite TV channel!!!

Mathemagic

2008-03-08T21:12:00.000-06:00

This guy is freakin' awesome.

Star Wars Jokes Never Die

2008-03-04T11:08:00.000-06:00

Enter the ICHC online Poker Cats Contest!

Oh Man...

2008-03-03T21:50:00.000-06:00

i want this.

And this...

Viva la calculator!

I tutored a girl today who said that her professor wouldn't let them use calculators on parts of their test. Why? It's a resource that people should be allowed to use. I realize that the prof wants the students to learn the stuff, but if I use a grapher to check my work afterwards anyways, what's wrong with that?

It takes a long time to do some of those calculations, too. I enjoy a good math session as much as the next girl, but sometime you just want to get it DONE so you can move on to the next stuff! (like on a test!)

Ultimately, it's the prof's decision, I guess. I'm glad my prof lets us use our TI's.

Proof That I Am Getting Smarter

2008-02-29T16:44:00.000-06:00

Part of a Trigonometric Substitution example, courtesy Wikipedia.org.

My group members and I did several of these problems today, and they were very easy. If you had told me ten years ago that I would be doing these types of problems, and excelling at them (even enjoying them sometimes!), I would have told you that you were nutso.

But I am actually enjoying the process of learning how to do the more complex problems.

Go figure.

(Still the only girl. I rule.)

Katiefucious Pwns Teh Calculuses Again

2008-02-21T10:38:00.000-06:00

Notes for today:

Test on Vectors, Natural Logarithm Defined as an Integral, Exponential Growth and Decay, Volume of Three-Dimensional Objects on a Coordinate Plane:

pwnd.

Still the only girl...

Beginning to think am smartest girl in the universe.

Plan to take over the world.

OH MY GOD!

2008-02-15T11:44:00.000-06:00

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!!111ELEVENTY!!!

pre-ordered!